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Back to our discourse for today. The greatest lover of our souls is God Himself! What has He been trying to do? It’s just one thing! To keep communication with us!
In a world filled with constant distractions, communication is the cornerstone of any successful relationship. Effective communication is not just about talking; it’s about understanding, empathizing, and connecting with your partner on a deeper level.
This devotional aims to provide you with invaluable insights into how lovers can communicate better, enhancing the quality of their relationship and, ultimately, bringing them closer together.
How Lovers Can Communicate Better
The Power of Active Listening
A major aspect of effective communication is active listening. It’s not merely waiting for your turn to speak but genuinely absorbing what your partner is saying.
I used to be right on this table! I would just be looking for something with which to give a resounding logical reply without actually listening! Can you imagine? Listen well and deliberately and you will connect more with your spouse!
When you actively listen, you show respect and empathy, which are key ingredients for successful communication.
Practice active listening by maintaining eye contact, nodding in agreement, and asking open-ended questions. This creates an open and inviting atmosphere for your partner to express themselves.
How Lovers Can Communicate Better
Choose Your Words Wisely
Words can cut and lacerate! Words can proceed as weapons of massive destruction tearing everything apart that it collides with. It can also be an agent of peace, a tool of tranquility, and a wrath killer! How are you using words with your spouse?
Words have a profound impact on our relationships. A thoughtless phrase can lead to misunderstandings and even conflicts. To communicate better with your partner, it’s essential to choose your words wisely and speak with kindness and consideration.
Before speaking, take a moment to reflect on your thoughts and emotions. This will help you communicate in a calmer and more composed manner.
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SINGLES – Practical Tips To Make Your Fiancée Happy
George who is in courtship with Lucy is frustrated. Lucy is always vacillating between two extreme emotions and poor George is at a loss on how to make her happy. If I can be experiencing this before marriage, what will happen after? George reasoned.
As a single in courtship, how do you make her happy?
It is important you keep in touch daily especially if you are not in the same place. If this all-important communication is not there, trust me, there will be issues coming up from time to time.
As singles, stop being egocentric and learn the art of apologizing quickly both ways. Don’t let your courtship be filled with memories of weeping, feeling down and out. It is not a good seed into your marriage.
As singles, take decisions together and don’t let her feel you are the superman that can do all things. If she relaxes and you run the relationship all by yourself, she would get used to that style and the help you ought to get from her when you are down will not be there. Don’t muffle her.
To be continued…
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I receive wisdom to understand my partner and to love him/her more.
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY I break free from all wrong mindsets about marriage in Jesus name.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY And did not he make one? Yet had he the residue of the spirit. And wherefore one? That he might seek a godly seed. Therefore take heed to your spirit, and let none deal treacherously against the wife of his youth. (Mal 2:15 KJV)
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Surprise your partner today. That does not include kissing, petting, sex etc. Reserve those till after marriage.
Twenty Two Things We’ve Learnt In Twenty Two Years
Today is our wedding anniversary! It has been God o! Literarily.
And the way the years moved so fast? Like it has been twenty two years! Twenty two long years!
Even though, it kind of looked so fast, I can assure you it has been a long marital road. However, I can also tell you this of which I am sure of, the long road of our marital journey is laced with mercy!
GOD’s loyal love couldn’t have run out, his merciful love couldn’t have dried up.
Lam 3:22 (MSG)
We travelled on mercy. We had junctions of His favour! We had stops where angels ministered to us. To God be the praise!
Here are a few things things I have learnt that may help you in your marriage
1. Pray a lot as married couples. Do everything in prayer. The battle is intense, but God has all the power.
2. Stay close to each other. Do not allow a third party to break your bond.
3. Get a marriage mentor that you can speak to from time to time. Very important.
4. Be open and honest with each other. Avoid unnecessary secrecy.
5. Be faithful to each other. Avoid emotional affairs. Do not starve your spouse emotionally.
6. Be quick forgivers. Forgive quickly and avoid strife like a plague
7. Be friends. Laugh a lot. Play with each other. You need that to live long
8. Do not allow anything to steal your joy. Keep your joy intact.
9. Do not deprive each other sexually. Satisfy each other and never refuse yourselves. Sex is never a tool of punishment or a reward system. It is simply an obligation
10. Decide to be sacrificial. Live to please each other. That is what marriage is all about.
11. Never stop communication. Do not give each other silent treatment. Crack jokes a lot and play together
12. Give a lot. Work hard and trust God for His favour upon the works of your hands.
To be continued tomorrow.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I celebrate my spouse today and always
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Oh Lord, increase my passion for my lover.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY 1 Corinthians 13:5 Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil;
I purposelydid not use the word ‘Love Language’ but used your wife’s ‘Language’ so that you can see the similarities. It is easier for us to relate to ‘your wife’s Language’ than it is to relate to love language.
Just as you can never think of marrying a wife who does not speak your language, it is ridiculous for you not to speak your wife’s love language.
Every woman has a love language. That love language is what she understands, is used to, and can relate to. In this language, she understands and can sense love.
Until you speak this language, she cannot sense or understand that you love her. It is like speaking Japanese to an English woman. It does not make any sense, and you sure are not making sense to her.
A woman knows that you love her when you communicate this love in a language that she understands. The problem is that most men are communicating this love to their wives in another language.
Note that there is something in every woman that craves being loved by her husband. Yes, she can be loved by her colleagues, friends, or siblings but there is something about the love of her husband. It may be because it is the way God ordered it from the beginning.
Eph 5:33 Nevertheless, let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife [see] that she reverence [her] husband.
If husbands want to be found fulfilling their primary and basic role in the marriage covenant, it is good for each husband to learn to speak his wife’s language.
It makes a lot of sense if you at least become conversant with your wife’s language. It helps better communication in the marriage institution. Just like in our illustration of the English woman and the Japanese language speaking to her.
There are five basic love languages. We will look at each one so you can get a good understanding of each of them.
1. Words of affirmation
2. Quality time
5. Physical touch
All these love languages are to be understood if you want to love your wife on her own terms (in her own language) and not yours.
1. Words of affirmation.
If this is your wife’s love language, that just means that she likes to be spoken to. She may or may not be quiet, it doesn’t really matter. What matters is that your words mean a lot to her. You have to be constantly speaking words of encouragement to her.
Appreciating her by commenting on her efforts, looks, achievements, and verbalizing your love must be regular.
She senses love when she’s been constantly spoken to. Her energy to move on comes by appreciating her and saying sweet words to her. When you don’t speak kind words to her, she doesn’t sense your love towards her as a husband. Your words must be kind.
If on the contrary, you speak harshly to her, she senses harshness rather than love and sensitivity.
We will continue tomorrow.
God bless your marriage
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I am patient.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Pray for wisdom in your marriage
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY “In the same way you married men should live considerately with [ your wives ], with an intelligent recognition [ of the marriage relation ], honoring the woman as [ physically ] the weaker, but [ realizing that you ] are joint heirs of the grace (God’s unmerited favor) of life, in order that your prayers may not be hindered and cut off. [ Otherwise, you cannot pray effectively. ]” (1Pe 3:7, AMP)
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Find out what her love language is