SINGLES – How To Be Sure Of Your Choice In Marriage
Being directed or led by God is the most important issue before marriage; when you are not led, it only leads to misery, pains, sorrow, and regrets.
My prayer is that you will not experience these. If your answer to that prayer is amen, now is the time to be sure that the person you are in love with is God’s choice for you.
Just because you are in love with someone does not give you enough basis to enter into a lifetime covenant with the person. It’s very easy to fall in love, all it takes is that person having all the qualities you admire, being physically attractive, spending time together, giving him/her a special place in your heart, thinking about him/her a lot and you’re already in love.
You’ll agree with me that it’s possible to fall in love with more than one person but only one person is qualified to be your wife/husband.
Once you have identified your spouse, you are no longer permitted to desire others, but to only admire them.
GOD then used the rib that he had taken from the Man to make Woman and presented her to the Man. The Man said, “Finally! Bone of my bone, flesh of my flesh! Name her Woman for she was made from Man.” Therefore a man leaves his father and mother and embraces his wife. They become one flesh. –Genesis 2:22-24 (MSG)
The above scripture shows that God himself was very much involved in bringing the man and the woman together.
For as many as are led by the Spirit of God, they are the sons of God. –Romans 8:14 (KJV)
The question is, do you have God’s spirit? Are you born again? If yes, how are you working on your relationship with God? How consistently do you study God’s word?
What service do you render in a local assembly? How well you answer these questions will determine how well your spirit is developed to receive directions from God, not only in matters of your relationships but in all areas.
You must also make sure that the three aspects of you agree with the choice of your life partner.
Man is essentially a spirit; you have a soul and live in a body. Do these three (spirit, soul, and body) agree in perfect harmony.
Is there peace? Is he/she intelligent and emotionally mature?
Are you friends? Someone said friendship in marriage is about one soul living in two bodies.
Physically, does he/she meet your standard of beauty? Are you attractive to each other?
Go to any length to find adequate answers to these questions. Ask him/her a lot of questions. Find out where he/she is going. Can you fit in?
Is the guy a good leader? How well has he led himself? Can he lead you well?
Becoming sure is all about erasing every doubt or question in your heart about the person, the relationship, and the future. No one can be sure for you. Until you’re totally sure and convinced, don’t say YES!
Don’t tie the nuptial knots until all the knotty issues are resolved. I pray that God will send help your way in Jesus name!
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I have direction from God. In my relationship decisions, I am being led by the Spirit of God. I am not confused in Jesus Name. I will not fall in love with the wrong person. The Spirit of God will help me to be sure.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY I destroy every spirit of distraction and deception in Jesus name.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Take me by the hand; Lead me down the path of truth. You are my Savior, aren’t you? Psalms 25:5 (MSG)
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Think deeply about your relationships and take an inventory
Thank God I am not God! If I were God, probably a lot of folks would have met me up there – “Today, thou shall meet me in Paradise!” And really, thank God you are not God too! Oh my, my…It would have been serious. God is just, truthful, and full of righteousness. His thoughts are different from ours.
If I were God, sincerely, some of the portions of the Bible would not be there. I will not include the adulterous fling and murder committed by our beloved King David; neither will I include the visits to prostitutes of our Macho Man, Samson.
But God in His unfathomable wisdom knew it is the truth that will set us free. A lot of people would not have been set free from suicidal guilt over what they have done, but upon learning that God gave David and Samson a second chance, they realized that there was still hope for them.
But what was the genesis of their problems? You wouldn’t believe one of the things I found out here!
Their eyes! This becomes more interesting when you put in mind that men are moved by sight, one of The Doorway To Your Thoughts. Check out the following scriptures:
And it came to pass in an evening tide, that David arose from off his bed, and walked upon the roof of the king’s house: and from the roof he SAW a woman washing herself; and the woman was very beautiful to look upon. –2Samuel 11:2 (KJV)
What of Samson?
And Samson went down to Timnath, and SAW a woman in Timnath of the daughters of the Philistines. –Judges 14:1 (KJV)
Then went Samson to Gaza, and SAW there a harlot, and went in unto her. –Judges 16:1 (KJV)
What really made Amnon rape her sister, Tamar?
So Tamar went to her brother Amnon’s house, and he was laid down. And she took flour, and kneaded it, and made cakes in HIS SIGHT
…he would not hearken unto her voice: but, being stronger than she, forced her, and lay with her. –2Samuel 13:8,14 (KJV)
From all these, there are two things.
1. Men, watch what you see
2. Ladies, watch what is seen.
How are the guys supposed to achieve this? Never look again? Well, you are permitted to admire, but not desire. There is a difference between a first glance and then a serious look!
There is a difference between looking and getting obsessed with what you see in your thoughts.
No wonder Job said:
I made a covenant with mine eyes; why then should I think upon a maid? –Job 31:1 (KJV)
Another translation says:
I promised myself never to stare with desire at a young woman. –Job 31:1 (CEV)
So what are we supposed to do with our eyes?
My son, attend to my words; incline thine ear unto my sayings. Let them not depart from thine eyes; keep them in the midst of thine heart. –Proverbs 4:20-21 (KJV)
No wonder Jesus Christ said:
The light of the body is the eye: if therefore thine eye be single, thy whole body shall be full of light. –Matthew 6:22 (KJV)
Pornography begins with what you see one day. The seed of fornication is planted when you see what stirs lust.
The sin of masturbation is achieved with what you have seen and stored up in your mind.
I guess this is why God said the book of the Law shall not depart from your eyes. When you keep looking at God’s word, you will not be seeing wrong things! The Doorway To Your Thoughts
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY My eyes are riveted on God’s word. I love God’s word. I am not obsessed with lust as a result of what I see. I have the mind of Christ. My utmost desire will be towards my husband/wife and not towards any other.
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY I destroy every spirit of lust in my life in Jesus Name, I receive help from the Holy Spirit to understand His Word.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY I promised myself never to stare with desire at a young woman. (Job 31:1 CEV)
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Decide never to stare at seductively dressed ladies. Decide not to see films and movies that have nude scenes.
Masturbation is simply defined as “Manual stimulation of the genital organs (of yourself or another) for sexual pleasure.”
Singles and married people alike often believe that there is nothing wrong with masturbation. When I was growing up, I read a book that says, “95 percent of boys masturbate and the remaining 5 percent lied.” Invariably, that is like saying that everybody masturbates. Today, not just boys, but men, girls, and women masturbate.
Now, some Christians even do so, and with a lot of excuses why they should. Some offer excuses that since God says ‘Don’t fornicate’ and we really are obeying God, masturbation must be God’s way of relieving the pressure build-up. Could that be true?
Some pastors are as confused about the subject as their members on the issue, and some also pointedly say there is nothing wrong with it. This has sent a confusing signal to the body of Christ, thereby making an average believer who might have been struggling with masturbation to have enough reason to continue. Now, the major issue is that masturbation is progressive and what satisfied you the last time will not the next time!
Today, The Truth About Manual Stimulation is that it has gone to another level from hand stimulation to the use of sex toys that were produced for that specific purpose. A lot of folks are addicted to masturbation; they go to bed with dildos, vibrators, and the like.
There are human dolls built to respond like humans, there are several masturbators, and these things are a mockery of the dignity of the Homo sapiens! So, an average believer who has been told nothing is wrong dabbles into it, and before he knows it, he is hooked on pornography and other perversions, and that is the problem!
He will not be satisfied after a while, and this is also why a lot of people found themselves in sickening habits like bestiality, bondage sex, and so on! When you give the devil an inch, he will take a mile!
But is it true the New Testament never addressed the issue of masturbation because God wanted us to masturbate? I don’t think so. As far as I am concerned, that is like saying, “the Bible didn’t say we should not cook our rice with rat poison because he wanted us to commit suicide!
Now I am going to give you just one scripture. Let’s bear in mind that for one to masturbate:
There must be a thought process, a mental image of a man or woman or sex scene or sex pictures, which one focuses on, and then together with the manual stimulation, that brings one to orgasm.
This then means that for one to masturbate; there has to be a mental undressing of the object/person in question and a mental sexual experience!
Now here is what Jesus said:
But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart. –Matthew 5:28 (KJV)
This knocks off masturbation completely. The process that leads to masturbation is what Jesus Christ equated with adultery in the heart!
The message is clear! If you find yourself in this act, sincerely, God does not condemn you! He would not condone it either! In order for you to enjoy God’s fullness of blessings, He expects you to stay away from sin, so why don’t you call upon Him now to help you? He is there waiting to respond to you!
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY My body is the temple of the Holy Spirit. I will not desecrate my body with masturbation. I will preserve my virtue and sexual purity. I put my body under. I lose myself from every shackle of the evil one, my mind is covered with the blood of Jesus.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY I break myself free from all mental oppressions of the devil.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Don’t let anyone under pressure to give in to evil say, “God is trying to trip me up.” God is impervious to evil, and puts evil in no one’s way. The temptation to give in to evil comes from us and only us. We have no one to blame but the leering, seducing flare-up of our own lust. Lust gets pregnant, and has a baby: sin! Sin grows up to adulthood, and becomes a real killer. So, my very dear friends, don’t get thrown off course. –James 1:13-16 (MSG)
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Destroy and throw away all the sex toys, pornographic materials, sexual films, and all other things that act as masturbation trigger
SINGLES- How Do I Know If Someone Really Loves Me?
How to know if he/she really loves.
All Amnon wanted was to satisfy that rush of adrenalin. He went so far, as to think he was in love, but once his lust was pacified, love vanished into thin air.
Love is willing to wait, lust demands immediate satisfaction. Never forget that. True love will not insist that you compromise your virtue. True love will protect. True love will honour. True love will respect.
So what more is true love?
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Amnon feigned sickness and deceived his father!
True love will not pretend, deceive or trap you. He was never interested in the food. Amnon refused to consider the consequences.
True love is not stupid. True love stands to reason in respect to God’s standard Amnon’s love for Tamar was not natural. It was incest.
True love will not enter into perversion to prove itself; Amnon forced Tamar and raped her, despite that Tamar called him ‘brother’
True love will protect, it will not violate your sanctity. Amnon hated Tamar afterward.
True love is not fickle, instant, or temporal, it is enduring and lasting. True love does not go back and forth. It is stable. Even when tried, it still stands strong.
I pray for you today, that God will guide you, lead and help you to differentiate between true love and lust. You will not miss it in Jesus name!
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY God loves me. I will comprehend what true love is and operate in its boundaries. I am not confused. I have a sound mind. I receive God’s kind of love
PRAYER FOR THE DAY I break off from all emotional bondage. Spirit of God, lead me and guide me in my relationship, I resist every spirit of confusion and manipulations.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Better is a dinner of herbs where love is than a stalled ox and hatred therewith. –Proverbs 15:17 (KJV)
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Adjust your attitudes and start relating with the one who truely loves
What exactly is true love? How do I know if a man truly loves me? How do I know if a lady truly loves me?
While putting in mind that there are so many definitions and perceptions of what true love is, it is pertinent to remind ourselves that true love can only be defined by Scriptural standards. Why is this so? God is love.
True love can only come from anyone that really knows God. A man that doesn’t know God is incapable of showing true love. He may be caring and nice by your own standards, but as long as He doesn’t know God, he doesn’t understand the dynamics of true love.
That is why we will be going back into the Bible to see the true definition of love.
And it came to pass after this, that Absalom the son of David had a fair sister, whose name was Tamar; and Amnon the son of David loved her. And Amnon was so vexed, that he fell sick for his sister Tamar; for she was a virgin; and Amnon thought it hard for him to do anything to her. –2Samuel 13:1-2 (KJV)
In our devotion this morning, the story of Amnon comes to mind. Verse one of the above scripture tells us that Amnon was in love with his sister.
Verse two tells us that she was so vexed with love that he fell sick. It was no longer a soul’s battle; it became rottenness in his bones.
From the above, one will naturally conclude that this is genuine love. What do you think? Was the love genuine?
For him to fall sick, he must really be in love! Isn’t that how some men come around you and truthfully tell you that they can’t eat again, sleep again because of love? Can we conclude about a man’s love for a woman by virtue of his being “vexed” to the point of sickness?
Look at a few translations:
Amnon was obsessed with his sister Tamar to the point of making himself sick over her…–2Samuel 13:2 (MSG)
Can obsession equal true love?
And Amnon was so troubled that he fell sick…–2Samuel 13:2 (AMP)
Can being troubled equal true love?
And he was so deeply in love that he became ill… –2Samuel 13:2 (BBE)
Can being deeply in love equal true love?
Amnon became frustrated to the point of illness on account of his sister Tamar. –2Samuel 13:2 (NIV)
Can being frustrated equal true love?
Well, before we conclude, let’s see what happened a few verses away.
Howbeit he would not hearken unto her voice: but, being stronger than she, forced her, and lay with her. –2Samuel 13:2 (KJV)
Here is the Message translation:
But he wouldn’t listen. Being much stronger than she, he raped her. –2Samuel 13:2 (MSG)
This couldn’t be true love! How would you rape someone you profess to love? Something is not quite right there. Sometimes all he wants is sex. That is not love! Sometimes, all she wants is your money. That is not true love!
To be continued…
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY God loves me. I will comprehend what true love is and operate within its boundaries. I am not confused. I have a sound mind. I receive God’s kind of love
PRAYER FOR THE DAY I break off from all emotional bondage. Spirit of God, lead me and guide me in my relationship, I resist every spirit of confusion and manipulations.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Better is a dinner of herbs where love is than a stalled ox and hatred therewith. –Proverbs 15:17 (KJV)
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Adjust your attitudes and start relating with the one who truly loves
SINGLES – What Do You Do When Speed Becomes An Enemy
Continued from yesterday, when we talked about speed as an enemy.
We all have a destination and a desire for our home and marriage. You’ll only get there when you follow His step-by-step guidance. And if you miss “the particular junction” you can never reach that destination until you retrace your steps.
That particular junction for you might be,” Be Born Again”, Don’t Marry an unbeliever,” ‘Stop that kissing,” “Don’t Masturbate,” “Stop the Pornography,” and the likes. Sexual intercourse before marriage is a no-go area, don’t even think about it. And until you retrace your steps back there – it is the wrong way! You might just be wasting time, energy, and resources because a wrong way is a wrong way’. You cannot change that; you can only retrace your steps, and be on the right track.
I encourage you to retrace your steps this morning. There is no need to keep on driving in the wrong direction. Change! Switch! Where is the strength? You may ask? The strength comes from God as you take time to feed your spirit with his word, your inner man will be strengthened to say ‘No’ to every form of iniquity and forge ahead in God!
Your destiny and future are bright! That is why the devil has fought you that much. The enemy only fights who he fears! He knows if you can just get it right, he is in trouble. He knows if you can just stop that lustful lifestyle if you can just cut off that sinful relationship if you can just stay more in God’s word…whatever it takes to take charge of your life by His Spirit, decide to do it this morning.
Whoever hath ears, let him hear what the Spirit of God is saying this morning!
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY The Holy Spirit is leading me today. His word is a lamp unto my feet. God’s word is life and light for me. I take the right decisions in my relationship. Speed will not be an enemy for me.
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Lord, hold me by the right hand and let your word guide me daily.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Listen for GOD’s voice in everything you do, everywhere you go; he’s the one who will keep you on track. Pro 3:6 MSG
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Check the major areas of your life; relationships, family, finances, business, career, spiritual life, etc. Are you on the right track? If not, get back on the right track by asking God to forgive you of all misdeeds and asking for His help and direction.
There are times in your life that speed actually becomes an enemy! I have counseled people that were introduced to sexual perversion as young as when they were just five or six years old. That is when ‘speed’ becomes an enemy. Times when you were hooked up in sexual perversion when you did not even know your right from your left, courtesy of people who were supposed to protect you.
There are a lot of people out there who were dropped by their nurses like Mephibosheth, and consequently broke their ankles while on ‘speed’ But I write to you this morning, not to exile yourself like Mephibosheth, but to reach out to God who will not consult your past to determine your future! Speed might have been your enemy, but God is a re-writer of history.
Do not allow your background to keep your back on the ground. Rise from the rubbles and shackles of yesterday, because your best days are still ahead of you!
While staying in Lagos, on a particular day, we were to go to another area which is different from where we stayed and so we called a dear sister earlier for direction.
As we later found out, her direction was defective as we were practically driving out of the city! We were on the wrong way for quite some time. Her direction lacked landmarks, signs, or anything that will aid us to be sure if we were still on track.
She just said, “When you get to a particular junction keep going straight,” and we did! But the pathetic thing about it was that we got the junction wrong! So even though we were speeding AND GOING STRAIGHT, speed was not our friend because we were on the wrong path! Her guidance was not precise.
Thank God our God is not like this dear sister. God guides us in specific details, step by step, and then gives us “checks” here and there for us to know if we are still on the right path.
To be continued…
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I have God’s direction in my relationships. I am not confused. The Holy Spirit is leading me today.
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Lord, go with me on this journey of life.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Listen for GOD’s voice in everything you do, everywhere you go; he’s the one who will keep you on track. Pro 3:6 MSG
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Check the major areas of your life; relationships, family, finances, business, career, spiritual life, etc. Are you on the right track? If not, get back on the right track by asking God to forgive you of all misdeeds and asking for His help and direction.
As you read this, let every hurt and bitterness that you have towards God and man go, for it is an attempt of the devil to draw you into deception and depression. God is gracious! He is willing to stoop low to bless you. As a Father, He is full of compassion. When you begin to think about this, it is amazing how you will experience that compassion. God is good towards you. You are the work of His hands.
Rather than get bitter toward God, think about how His goodness and compassion will get you out of any mess.
As a single, you might have been abused or violated before you reached the age of accountability. Rather than give up and be regarded as part of the unfortunate statistics of sexual abuse, rise from that abyss, get out of the doldrums of yester-years, and look unto Him that is able to save to the uttermost.
He will embrace you and wipe the tears off your face. He will heal every wound, take all bitterness away from your heart, and bring out the best in you.
Think about it. Believe it. His tender mercies are over you. Respond to His love and experience the tender love of divinity coming upon your humanity.
You see, in order to enjoy that fullness of God’s love, you have to synergize with God and cooperate with His principles.
I see you rising from that problem that has kept you down for long. I see light dawning upon your soul. I see God’s word percolating every pressure and dismantling them.
His love is awesome. Thank him for His love. Forget about what you are going through, and dwell on what He went through for you! It changes the whole equation, and the devil will retreat. You will come to know that it is only by responding to God’s love that you understand how to love others and how to be loved!
I see you having victory!
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I position myself to benefit from God’s tender mercies. Goodness and mercy are following me.
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY I uproot every root of bitterness from my life in Jesus Name.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY You are merciful, LORD! You are kind and patient and always loving. You are good to everyone, and you take care of all your creation. (Psa 145:8-9 CEV)
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Make a list of all who have offended you in the past. Consciously let go and forgive them. It might not look easy, but do it all the same.
Every day comes with its pressures. The environment, economy and so many other factors affect an average man in a general sense. This becomes even compounded when you refuse to do things and work by the principles of God the Father. The issues take on a spiritual dimension. When you have to face physical pressures and spiritual battles, you can get wearied quickly.
The LORD is gracious, and full of compassion; slow to anger, and of great mercy. The LORD is good to all: and his tender mercies are over all his works. – (Psa 145:8-9 KJV)
There are times you feel that you are not supposed to face issues and pressures because you are a child of God. But the question is, “did Jesus face pressure while he was on earth? Did everybody believe straightaway that He is the son of God? Did Paul face pressure? What about our spiritual fathers? Did they face any? What of the Patriarchs? Abraham, Moses, David? What of the prophets? You see, there will always be pressures!
However, Jesus made a beautiful statement when he said:
DO NOT let your hearts be troubled (distressed, agitated). You believe in and adhere to and trust in and rely on God; believe in and adhere to and trust in and rely also on Me. – Joh 14:1 AMP
Are you troubled to an extent you are wondering whether God has gone on holiday? You might be single, dating, or courting. There is one constant truth you must not forget. It is the nature of God.
The devil strives to present a wrong picture of who God is to us. He knows that once we have a blurred vision of who God is to us, then we will not be able to enjoy the limitless blessings that God has for us.
But, I have to let you know this; God’s love for you is ever unchanging. He loves you absolutely and resolutely.
To be continued…
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I am loved of God. His tender mercies are over me. God will satisfy me early with His mercies. He is gracious and He is full of compassion.
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Lord, satisfy me early with your mercies.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY You are merciful, LORD! You are kind and patient and always loving. You are good to everyone, and you take care of all your creation. (Psa 145:8-9 CEV)
ACTION PLANFOR THE DAY Make a list of all who have offended you in the past. Consciously let go and forgive them. It might not look easy, but do it all the same.
Is he or she insisting on pre-marital sex? That is a distraction! You are surely not going to the same place and there is no point holding on in that kind of relationship.
You see, you have to know that except the Lord build a house, they labour in vain that build. If you don’t do it God’s way, all your ‘investments’ of time, money and energy on that relationship will go down the drain. Without God, there would be agony and heartache. A home without God is a playground for the devil and his cohorts.
As singles, you need to know it does not only take money or business acumen to run a marriage. It takes money, yes, plus a lot of wisdom and tact founded on a solid relationship with God. It takes a lot of prayers and determination to love your spouse always!
I pray for you this morning that every distraction on the path of your destiny is destroyed in Jesus name. God will strengthen you and give you all-round victory in Jesus name. May the eyes of your understanding be enlightened to see what you need to know to take you to the next level in God!
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I receive grace to cut away from relationships that will distract and pull me back.
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Lord, help me today to choose to walk with people who are in agreement with my destiny.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY When two of you get together on anything at all on earth and make a prayer of it, my Father in heaven goes into action. Mat 18:19 MSG
ACTION PLANFOR THE DAY Write the names of your 10 closest friends. Strikeout the names of those who are not going in the same direction as you are going.
The wisest king of Israel once said that two are better than one because they have a good reward for their labour. That is if they are going the same way
If one falls, the other can help his friend get up. But how tragic it is for the one who is all alone when he falls. There is no one to help him get up. Again, if two people lie down together, they can keep warm, but how can one person keep warm? Though one person may be overpowered by another, two people can resist one opponent. A triple-braided rope is not easily broken. A young man who is poor and wise is better than an old, foolish king who won’t take advice any longer. A young man came out of prison to rule as king, even though he had been born in poverty in that same kingdom. Ecc 4:10-14 GW
But the pertinent question is which two? Is it just any two? It is definitely not so.
God asked a question, and He is still asking in Amos 3:3. Can two walk together except they agree? When God asks a question, it is not because He does not know the answer, but because He wants you and me to think about the question.
Before you enter that relationship, you need to ask yourself four very important questions.
1. Can he/she go with me?
2. Will he/she go with me?
3. Can he/she grow with me?
4. Will he/she grow with me?
If the two of you are not going the same way, then you do not have a business with that person no matter how handsome or beautiful the person is.
Is your decision based on attraction or direction? Your marital journey is sweeter and smoother when the two of you are going to the same place. Your focus and vision are single. You have the advantage of cooperation and joint effort. You are not pulling at each other, distracting yourselves, and moving contrary to each other.
The pain in your relationship may be a signal that you are not going the same way. Please, do not ignore these signals.
If he/she is not born again and you are, it is a dangerous sign. Don’t say yes to an unbeliever or one with a different spiritual standing.
To be continued…
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I receive grace to cut away from relationships that will distract and pull me back.
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Lord, help me today to choose to walk with people who are in agreement with my destiny.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY When two of you get together on anything at all on earth and make a prayer of it, my Father in heaven goes into action. Mat 18:19 MSG
ACTION PLANFOR THE DAY Write the names of your 10 closest friends. Strike out the names of those who are not going the same direction as you are going.
The single man also needs to be connected to God because only God can give you direction to find a true wife.
The Bible talks about strange women, the Bible talks about adulterous women, and the Bible talks about evil men.
The Bible talks about wicked men whose tender mercies are cruel. You need God’s direction in order to choose rightly. Anybody can pretend in the pre-marriage years. Wrong attitudes and defective behavioural patterns can be shielded because you are in love. You will need God all the way.
He wants to favour you as a result of marriage. Your spouse is supposed to be a blessing and not a curse, an addition and not a minus. God is waiting for you, acknowledge Him in your relationship and courtship and you will experience favour.
Do it in God’s way and you will see favour! Don’t succumb to pressures from the environment and friends to compromise, be patient and be prayerful, so that you can rejoice at the end of the day.
Keep your virtue; don’t sleep around in your bid to find love or money, run back to God. You may think you are too far gone, but there are no such things in God, for Jesus is able to save from the gutter-most to the uttermost!
Therefore He is able also to save to the uttermost (completely, perfectly, finally, and for all time and eternity) those who come to God through Him, since He is always living to make petition to God and intercede with Him and intervene for them. –Hebrews 7:25 (AMP)
Despite all you might have done, God has not condemned you, He loves you too much to leave you alone and He loves you too much to see you stay where you have been.
It’s time to move up in God! God’s love for you remains unshaken and all you need to do now is talk to Him. You will see calmness descend on your soul as you invite Jesus into your life, you will almost feel the burdens lifted and He will become a father to you indeed!
This week and beyond, you will walk in God’s favour in Jesus name! Every struggle is removed in Jesus name!
Like a shield, God will surround you with His favour and He will surprise you this week, especially in your finances. That’s specifically for someone! You can as well just worship Him for that!
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I do not rely on my own understanding. I put my trust in God. He will direct me today. I am not confused; God’s light from His word is dawning upon my soul. I have favour in my relationship. I have favour in my marriage. I am favoured, and I am a favour channel.
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY God, help me to choose rightly. According to your word, O Lord, I am a favour factor to my spouse I nullify every negative power working against the counsel of God for my relationship. I declare RESTORATION of all that has been lost.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY You may inherit all you own from your parents, but a sensible wife is a gift from the LORD. Proverbs 19:14 (CEV)
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Take a pragmatic inventory before you make that proposal or before you give your consent, ask yourself whether God is involved. If God is not involved, it may not be worth it.
One of the ways God blesses us is through His favour upon us. There is nothing like having favour with God and favour with men! This favour comes when you are consistent with God and you live your life based on His principles.
This favour becomes activated when you refuse to trust in your own way of doing things and you decide to put your trust in Him as your father and the lover of your soul.
When you are out of this favour, struggles become the order of the day.
Relationships and marriage as designed by God are not supposed to be a nemesis, a source of agony and tales of regrets. It is supposed to usher you into favour!
Find a good spouse, you find a good life, and even more: the favour of GOD! –Proverbs 18:22 (MSG)
Favour is one factor you cannot joke with. Even Jesus had to increase in favour before God and man to be successful while on earth. Dear Single, Are You A Favour Factor?
Marriage then is a wonderful opportunity and a license into this favour. God is saying here that when you get married, you enter into favour.
No wonder the devil is constantly fighting the marriage institution. He is fighting your relationships because he does not want you to experience the favour factor in your marriage.
He tries to confuse a man as to who to find, how to find and where to find. He tries to make sure that the lady is not findable.
It is not the wedding ceremony that makes the lady a wife. That verse says, ‘He that finds a wife,’ which means you must become a wife material before you can be found.
That is when you are ready to be given out. Can a man look at you and say, you are the good that I am looking for?
Lady, are you a favour factor? You have to be with the Lord before you can be given to the man from the Lord! Until you are connected to God fully and completely, you cannot fulfil this purpose of being a favour from the Lord to your husband.
Dear Single, Are You A Favour Factor?
To be continued…
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I do not rely on my own understanding. I put my trust in God. He will direct me today. I am not confused; God’s light from His word is dawning upon my soul. I have favour in my relationship. I have favour in my marriage. I am favoured, and I am a favour channel.
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY God, help me to choose rightly. According to your word, O Lord, I am a favour factor to my spouse I nullify every negative power working against the counsel of God for my relationship. I declare RESTORATION of all that has been lost.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY You may inherit all you own from your parents, but a sensible wife is a gift from the LORD. Proverbs 19:14 (CEV)
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Take a pragmatic inventory before you make that proposal or before you give your consent, and ask yourself whether God is involved. If God is not involved, it may not be worth it.
Continuing from yesterday on friends, we began by using Amnon and Jonadab as our case study.
…maybe if his friend had not given him that counsel, he might have lived longer. So the question is, who is your friend? Your friend is the definition and description of your life. Watch the friends you have. Friendship is by choice and not by force.
If you are still single and probably living with your parents, can you confidently introduce your friend to your parents? If your friend is a goal-getter, he will influence you. If she is a gold digger, she will also influence you.
A friend is defined as a person you know well and regard with affection and trust. So you really want to be careful who is covering your back.
Don’t lie down with dogs or else you rise with fleas. Disconnect from those distracting your destiny. The one telling you that you cannot be rich unless you sell your body is not a friend.
The one telling you that you are a bush girl for being a virgin is a foe disguising as an enemy. The one telling you to cheat on your spouse and taste stolen waters is not a mentor but a tormentor of destiny!
The one telling you that you cannot make it unless you become crooked and con is not really a friend.
A good friend will bring progress into your life, but a bad friend will usher you into retrogression!
I love these translations of Proverbs 13:20
Become wise by walking with the wise; hang out with fools and watch your life fall to pieces. –Proverbs 13:20 (MSG)
Keep company with the wise and you will become wise. If you make friends with stupid people, you will be ruined. –Proverbs 13:20 (GNB)
So make up your mind today. Disconnect and reconnect where necessary. Friendship begins with friendship with Jesus. He will then lead you and guide and help you choose good friends who will add to your destiny.
May God, the lover of your soul guide you to choose good friends that will advance your life!
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I have the strength to disconnect from bad influences. I will no longer be subject to weak and beggarly elements. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. I have God’s Spirit and He helps me to choose my friends. I am not naïve, I am decisive in God.
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY God, deliver me from the snares and traps of wrong association. Open the eyes of my understanding, O Lord, and flood my heart with your light.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY There are friends who may be a man’s destruction, but there is a lover who keeps nearer than a brother. – Proverbs 18:24
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Make a list of your friends. The good, and the bad. Keep the good and disconnect from the bad ones. It is your choice.
Friends are powerful. They can make or Mar. In history, friends have been known to be foes in disguise, while perceived foes have turned out to be great friends.
Friends are a great influence, and they will influence for good or for worse. You may not be able to choose the circumstances of your birth and the milieu of your family, but you can choose who you want as friends and discard those who are parasites.
But Amnon had a friend, whose name was Jonadab, the son of Shimeah David’s brother: and Jonadab was a very subtil man. -2Samuel 13:3
Amnon died a premature death. Ever before his light could shine, the flames were extinguished in a fit of the revengeful act. He lost the opportunity to bloom and blossom, his destiny was cut short, and his potential never saw the light of day.
He was a prince, a king’s son, but his royal blood was wasted, and his life terminated in the midst of days.
Amnon wouldn’t have died, if he has not been advised by a ‘friend’ Years before, he had heeded a counsel from a FRIEND whose counsel eventually canceled his destiny.
Jonadab was his friend, but his friend became the source of his nemesis. He had hopelessly fallen in love with his half-sister to the point of sickness. Jonadab advised him on how to get his sister’s attention. Singles, Be Careful How You Choose Your Friends
He followed his friend’s advice, feigned sickness, and eventually raped Tamar, his half-sister. Absalom who is also Tamar’s brother made sure he revenged. He went too far.
Two years down the line when Amnon thought all was gone and forgotten, Absalom ensured his murder. He murdered him. Singles, Be Careful How You Choose Your Friends
To be continued…
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I have the strength to disconnect from bad influences. I will no longer be subject to weak and beggarly elements. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. I have God’s Spirit and He helps me to choose my friends. I am not naïve, I am decisive in God.
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY God, deliver me from the snares and traps of wrong association. Open the eyes of my understanding, O Lord, and flood my heart with your light. I will choose rightly, I will not marry wrong.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY There are friends who may be a man’s destruction, but there is a lover who keeps nearer than a brother. – Proverbs 18:24
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Make a list of your friends. The good and the bad. Keep the good and disconnect from the bad ones. It is your choice.
SINGLES – How To Survive Hurts And Disappointments
Continued from yesterday…
Forgiveness is releasing the offender in your heart only to discover you are freeing yourself. The offender or the person that hurt has moved on, and it is even probable he might meet Jesus along the way, retrace his steps and do well. It is you that must not resign to fate because of some past occurrences, let go and let God!
Why must you forgive hurts? God says so. You also want Him to forgive you anyway.
It will be too much to hold a person or persons in bitterness in your heart. Free yourself and allow God who is the re-writer of history to rewrite your life. Allow God who can collapse years to recompense every lost year. Allow God who is the restorer to help you to the point that you will forget the shame of your youth!
Yes, he really hurt you. He jilted you. She deceived you. He pushed you into abortions. She eloped with your money. He raped you. Your cousin violated you. Your big sister abused you. Your father slept with you. Your house-help did this and that…the issues are endless…It has happened!
Don’t ostracize yourself like Mephibosheth to Lo-debar, a land of no communication because he was dropped by his caretaker and broke his ankles. Rather, allow God to make a message out of the mess. Allow Him to turn the mistakes into miracles. That is How To Survive Hurts And Disappointments.
Allow God to birth a dream out of the doom. Allow him to showcase you to the world that when He covers anybody with His glory, the shame and the embarrassments become a thing of the past, and the broken become masters at mending.
The first step is to forgive hurts. I pray for strength for you today in your inner man to let go. Some of you have bottled it for years and it has kept you captive like when a lion holds its prey at the jugular.
Don’t allow bitterness and strife to lock their jaws on you and keep you immobilized. If you need somebody to talk with to initiate the healing process, feel free to give me a call on +234 802 3507395. If I don’t pick up your calls, keep trying, I might be in a meeting.
Don’t just become a survivor. Become a forgiver!
It’s a new day for you!
You will succeed!
Your life will be a testimony!
You are blessed!
How To Survive Hurts And Disappointments
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY My future is colorful and bright. I will not allow an unforgiving spirit to rob me of it. I receive grace to forgive all hurts and offense
PRAYERS FOR TODAY Lord, I ask you to give me a loving heart like Jesus. Give me a heart that forgives hurts and prays for those who despitefully use us.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Mat 6:14For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you:
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Make a list and forgive all and don’t keep an unforgiving spirit
SINGLES – How To Survive Hurts And Disappointments
Today’s devotional is about a decision we all have to make. Some people have been badly abused, cheated and taken for granted in their past relationships. They feel justified to hold their offenders in unforgiving spirit but the truth is that an unforgiving spirit holds you as a prisoner to the past.
You cannot be pregnant of yesterday and expect to deliver of your tomorrow and enjoy your today. Nature detest vacuum. It is either your heart is filled with the bitterness of yesterday or filled with the joy of today and the hope of tomorrow.
Some of you were rejected and forgotten by your fathers. Some of our mothers were not there when we needed them. They failed in their responsibilities to bring us up. Some mothers even abandon their babies. Some of those we love and hold in respect disappointed us, even abused and violated us.
For some, a trusted friend, aunty, brother, sister, cousin or even a fiancee betrayed your loyalty.
No matter the case, God understands. He knows the pain of the hurts. He loves you so much as you are but He also loves you too much to leave you the way you are. He desires your healing.
Remember He is a Doctor, the Physician. Doctors prescribe the medication for your recovery. The patient will have to trust the expertise of the doctor to receive his health back. No matter how painful or bitter the medication is, the patient has to follow through patiently. You endure the pain knowing it is just for a while…
Most medicines, injections, drips, operations or any recovery procedure are not palatable, but because our health is also very important, we endure them all.
I want you to see yourself as a patient today and Jesus as the doctor, telling you to forgive as a medication to heal your hurts and make you free again to live, love and laugh.
Remember you are not perfect either and always need the gift of forgiveness from God. The fact is that as long as you are still alive, you will hurt people, people will hurt you and you will need each other’s forgiveness.
To be continued…
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY My future is colourful and bright. I will not allow an unforgiving spirit to rob me of it. I receive grace to forgive all who have hurt and offended me
PRAYERS FOR TODAY Lord, I ask you to give me a loving heart like Jesus. Give me a heart that forgives and prays for those who despitefully use us.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Mat 6:14For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you:
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Make a list and forgive all and don’t keep an unforgiving spirit
The Samaritan woman had met so many men… but then when she met the man, the lover of her soul, she couldn’t but express the difference that turned her life around!
The woman then left her waterpot, and went her way into the city, and saith to the men, Come, see a man… -John 4:28-29 (KJV)
Respond to God’s love today. Refuse the emotion of guilt! You see the moment you have asked your father to forgive you, He forgives and forgets. The devil tries to bring guilt so that you can feel unworthy and thereby prevent you from coming into God’s presence boldly.
But you see, this issue is a family affair! If your earthly father has forgiven you of an offense, what else can the servant in the house say? You simply tell him to shut up!
That is the way you handle the devil. It’s none of his business. God forgave you, period.
Tell the devil to shut up, it’s between you and your father, it’s a family affair and it is settled! He should stop poke nosing.
The blood of Jesus handled it already! If he tries to remind you of your past, remind him of his future, it’s the bottomless pit! Make sure you stop sinning.
That is what God does not want, continuous and habitual sins. Grace cannot abound when sin continues! Only hearken to what Jesus said to that adulterous woman caught in the act.
… And Jesus said unto her, neither do I condemn thee: go, and sin no more. –John 8:11 (KJV)
The fact is that you did something wrong.
The lie is that you will never be forgiven.
The truth is that you are already forgiven and it is forgotten! Embrace the truth today and let it set you free! Truth is superior to the fact!
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY Sin will not have dominion over me. I am able to follow God’s injunctions. I put my body under. All my sins are forgiven. I am a new a creature
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Lord, strengthen me in my inner man. Help me to comprehend with all the saints what is the length, breadth and height, and depth of your love for me.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY He touched my mouth with the coal and said, “Look. This coal has touched your lips. Gone your guilt, your sins wiped out.” –Isaiah 6:7 (MSG)
Having to start your day by asking God for forgiveness daily can be very frustrating, especially when you know you are going to commit the sin again.
Self-condemnation comes once we violate God’s principles. This self condemnation will surface at unexpected times. Most times, young folks get involved in premaritalee before marriage in order to express their freedom or liberty.
In the end, the purpose is defeated, because the very freedom they seek to express will be lost to emotional captivity and slavery. Freedom from a guilty conscience will be gone.
Years ago, a lady sat before me. She was genuinely troubled. She felt God would never forgive her because she was involved in pre-marital sex. She wept bitterly.
She said she has asked God to forgive her severally and she was not sure God heard her.
Another lady actually lost her mind after indulging in this same act because she believed she had committed an unpardonable sin. She couldn’t recognize anybody again.
She embraced the devil’s lie that she has committed the unpardonable sin because of pre-marital sex. She was talking gibberish and making faces. When we were called (alongside another pastor) to pray for her, all our attempts failed until we started to address the issue of guilt by the Spirit of God.
As we began to speak to her about God’s love and kindness, that demon left her, she calmed down, sobered up and tears began to flow. It was only then she was restored. It was then she told us what really happened. The negative emotion of guilt is a terrible experience. Guilt can be so real to the point of being suicidal.
When troubles ganged up on me, a mob of sins past counting, I was so swamped by guilt I couldn’t see my way clear. More guilt in my heart than hair on my head, so heavy the guilt that my heart gave out. –Psalms 40:12 (MSG)
I’m swamped by my bad behavior, collapsed under gunnysacks of guilt. –Psalms 38:4 (MSG)
You wouldn’t want to live with guilt all your life for violating God’s law. However, no matter how guilty you feel right now; God can always send help if you call upon Him and trust in His Word. That’s the way out.
It could be a sin of fornication or adultery or any form of sexual perversion, the blood of Jesus took care of all!
Then I let it all out; I said, “I’ll make a clean breast of my failures to GOD.” Suddenly the pressure was gone– my guilt dissolved, my sin disappeared. –Psalms 32:5 (MSG)
I want you to know that there is a lover of your soul that is different from any lover who might have disappointed you. You might have been disappointed by men, abandoned by men, used and dumped by men, treated shabbily by men…but when you meet the man, He will restore your soul!
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY Sin will not have dominion over me. I am able to follow God’s injunctions. I put my body under. All my sins are forgiven. I am a new a creature
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Lord, strengthen me in my inner man. Help me to comprehend with all the saints what is the length, breadth and height, and depth of your love for me.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY He touched my mouth with the coal and said, “Look. This coal has touched your lips. Gone your guilt, your sins wiped out.” –Isaiah 6:7 (MSG)
SINGLES – How To Detect A Problem in Your Relationship
Continued from yesterday…
3. Only God knows who will make heaven. We are all deceiving ourselves
No! We are not all deceiving ourselves.
You see, this type of attitude reduces a person to a mediocre Christian. No energy or passion for God. He is not committed to his local assembly, he is disconnected from the vine as it were.
Anybody who is not enthusiastic about serving God will always have issues in his or her spiritual life.
4. I don’t like speaking in tongues. I’m not for that balderdash.
Well speaking in tongues is not balderdash!
Speaking in tongues is the supernatural utterance that God has given us to forge ahead in life, stay in touch with Him, and ensure our victory always.
When anybody makes the above statement, it is an indication of serious and deeper issues that will show up later.
5. The Bible never says we should not drink. We only should not get drunk
This person will surely drink and even indulge in other excesses. He or she already told you ahead of time!
When any of the above statement is being made, don’t turn a deaf ear to them. Pay attention to them, seek counsel and pray again and again.
It is better to remain single until the right person shows up than to desperately rush into marriage with the wrong person.
I pray for you this morning, you will not miss it in Jesus name
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I have the wisdom of God to detect problems
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, show me what may not be obvious
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Jer 33:3 (KJV)Call unto me, and I will answer thee, and shew thee great and mighty things, which thou knowest not.
