Are you a minister, pastor, church worker, or leader who lives in Ibadan? You are cordially invited to “Equip” a Minister’s Conference with Rev Femi Oduwole and Rev Gbeminiyi Eboda as part of our 9th anniversary convention.
Rev Dunamis and Sophia Okunowo will also be hosting us. Attendance is free, but registration is required. Kindly register HERE
Don’t miss it. Spread the word!
To my future wife, whoever and wherever you are—this letter is for you. Though we may not yet know each other, I want to speak honestly about the journey ahead of us. Marriage is a sacred covenant, not just between two people but also with God (Malachi 2:14). It requires preparation, humility, and intentionality from both sides. So before our paths cross or our vows unite us, let me ask: Are you really ready for me?
1. Are You Ready to Partner in Purpose?
Marriage isn’t just about romance—it’s about partnership. Amos 3:3 asks, “Do two walk together unless they have agreed to do so?” Before we can walk side by side, we must first agree on the direction we’re heading. Are you pursuing God’s purpose for your life? Do you understand that marriage amplifies ministry, calling us to serve Him together as one? If we’re both aligned with His will, our union won’t just be a relationship—it’ll be a mission field.
2. Are You Ready to Embrace Imperfection?
Let’s get real—I’m far from perfect. Neither of us will enter this marriage without flaws, struggles, or areas where growth is needed. Ephesians 4:2 calls us to bear with one another in love, “being completely humble and gentle.” Can you embrace my imperfections while challenging me to become better? Likewise, am I willing to do the same for you? Love isn’t blind; it sees clearly yet chooses to stay committed through grace and forgiveness.
3. Are You Ready to Communicate Openly?
Healthy communication is the backbone of any strong marriage. James 1:19 reminds us to be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry. Are you ready to share your heart vulnerably, even when it feels uncomfortable? Will you extend patience when misunderstandings arise? Honest dialogue fosters trust, intimacy, and unity—the pillars of a thriving relationship.
4. Are You Ready to Prioritize God Above All Else?
Our marriage won’t succeed if it’s built solely on feelings or convenience—it must be rooted in God. Matthew 6:33 tells us to seek first His kingdom, and everything else will fall into place. As much as I long to love and cherish you, nothing should come before my relationship with Christ—and the same must be true for you. When God is at the center, our love becomes unshakeable because it’s anchored in eternity.
5. Are You Ready to Fight Together?
Marriage isn’t always easy; there will be seasons of joy and seasons of struggle. But here’s the truth: We won’t fight against each other—we’ll fight for each other. Ecclesiastes 4:12 says, “A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.” With God binding us together, we’ll face challenges as a team. Are you prepared to stand firm, pray fervently, and never give up—even when the road gets tough?
Final Thought:
My dearest future wife, I write these words not to intimidate but to inspire. Marriage is a beautiful journey, but it demands readiness—from both of us. As you prepare your heart for this lifelong commitment, remember that love is more than a feeling; it’s a choice, a sacrifice, and a reflection of God’s unwavering devotion to us.
If you’re reading this, take courage. Whether we meet tomorrow or years from now, I trust that God is preparing you just as He’s preparing me. Let’s commit to seeking Him above all else, knowing that He will guide our steps toward each other in His perfect timing. Until then, keep growing, keep praying, and keep believing—for the best is yet to come.
Love isn’t built in a day, like we desire it to. It’s planted, watered, nurtured, and pruned. Four hard tasks. In other words, love actually screams work!
Too many people want the flowers of love—the romance, the connection, the companionship, the communication, the oneness—without committing to the gardening. But gardens don’t bloom because we wish them to. They bloom because someone gets their hands dirty.
In relationships, planting looks like intentionality—choosing someone, showing up consistently, building trust. You have to be intentional about your relationship—right from choosing someone.
Watering looks like kind words, small acts of service, listening, and forgiveness.
Pruning? That’s probably the tough one. It means removing habits, attitudes, and even friendships that threaten the health of your love. Why are you still chatting with your ex and hiding it from your spouse? Why are you still hanging out with him/her without your spouse? That relationship has to go! That’s pruning.
So, gardens need work. Neglect a garden long enough and weeds grow—resentment, silence, pride, selfishness. And soon, something that once had promise becomes overgrown with pain.
If you’re single, ask yourself: Am I becoming someone who knows how to garden love, or just someone who wants to enjoy its beauty?
If you’re married, ask: Have we been nurturing our garden, or have we let weeds grow unchecked?
The best gardens aren’t the ones with the rarest seeds. They’re the ones who were cared for every single day. They had the best gardeners who did the work.
So today, tend your garden.
Pull out a weed. Plant a word. Water with prayer. And trust God for the increase.
If you are not married, don’t demand for sexual gratification. If there is respect, you won’t want his/her virtue compromised to satisfy your own lust. Real love and respect is waiting.
2. Communication
Don’t discuss your past, inadequacies and failures in great detail at the inception of the relationship. Some details are better left until there is acceptance, trust and understanding between the two parties.
However, basic issues like health status, genotype, family history and some other crucial issues need to be discussed as early as possible. If he/she finds out years later, mistrust can easily rear up its heads.
3. Chastity
Don’t start kissing someone you met two hours ago. Don’t end up in a car or in corner in a sexual encounter with a total stranger. That is gross irresponsibility and indiscipline. Moreover, you will be offending God.
4. Emotional Needs
Do not depend on one another for the fulfillment and satisfaction of every emotional need. Your partner is not the Holy Spirit. Participate in activities outside your romantic relationship. Don’t be parochial. Be creative and be open to ideas that will further move your relationship forward. Learn, read books, attend seminars together.
5. Selflessness
Guard against selfishness. Both sides should be involved in giving. Love should be reciprocal. It is not a one way affair, it is a song done by a duet. In marriage, there are no spectators; both are actors striving to get better and sowing energies and time into the marriage to make it work.
Stop quarreling everyday of your courtship. Follow the principles of God and stop every compromise. Make sure your foundation for marriage is rightly laid.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY Our love is rekindled daily. I love my spouse and I am committed to our marriage.
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Lord, open my eyes and show me what I know not.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Gal 6:7 GNB Do not deceive yourselves; no one makes a fool of God. You will reap exactly what you plant.
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Talk to God. Pour your heart to Him now
This weekend is KHC Couples Camp-Meeting! Holding at Redemption Camp! Registration is on this link – HERE For specific inquiries, chat up Pastor Sophia on +234 807 832 0566
We started on this yesterday!
4. Blame Shift
You are constantly blamed for their woes, problems, difficulties, lack, failure and unhappiness.
You are told that you are the reason for any misfortune in their lives.
You are constantly reminded that everything with them was okay until you came into their lives.
5. Withdrawal
They are adept in withdrawing into their shells in order to punish you and demand your attention. They disengage and use neglect, abandonment, and measured withdrawals to punish, frighten and intimidate you.
6. You are always in the wrong
They make you feel that they are always right, and you are wrong. They would arrange facts and sentiments to prove that to you over and over again until you start thinking there is a curse on you, or that some people are fighting you spiritually from your village.
7. Control over you finances
They try to control your finances and how you spend money. Your credit card is permanently with them.
They tell you what to buy and what not to buy. You are told that you are a careless spender and and you cannot mange money well.
They end up emptying your account from month to month and keep threatening you that they will leave you and you will not be able to survive.
You know what?
God has made you free from such manipulative relationships!
Our soul is escaped as a bird out of the snare of the fowlers: the snare is broken, and we are escaped.
Psa 124:7 (KJV)
The snare of the soul has been broken by the Lord Jesus Christ. Do not subject yourself under any weak and beggarly element again! You have been made free!
I pray for all who might be in an emotionally draining and abusive alliance. I break the power of such deceptions and manipulations in Jesus name and I proclaim you free in Jesus name!
Whosoever the son of man has made free is free indeed! You are free from today in Jesus name!
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY The eyes of my understanding are opened to see these signs.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, open the eyes of my understanding.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Proverbs 22:24 Make no friendship with an angry man; and with a furious man thou shalt not go:
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Disconnect from every wrong relationship when
Emotional abuse is a weapon normally used to control and bring dominance upon the other person. This is often because the abuser has past childhood wounds and insecurities that are still fresh, mostly because they were abused themselves.
Do not cope with an emotionally abusive relationship. At the end of the day, it is never worth it.
Emotionally abusive relationships end up damaging your self-esteem and dignity. It often involves a consistent pattern of verbal attacks, threats, bullying, and unending criticism, using tools like manipulation, intimidation, and shaming.
In an emotionally abusive relationship, a form of deception is involved. This is because the victim usually would not see the experience as abusive. Coping mechanisms of denial are developed in order to subdue the attack.
However, the effects of long-term emotional abuse will cause emotional trauma and upheaval resulting in several dysfunctions and complications.
Did you miss out on yesterday’s devotional, we’ve got you covered. Kindly go HERE. For KHC video Devotionals, kindly go HERE
Emotional abuse can be debilitating and traumatic. God wants you free from emotionally abusive relationships.
Look at the scriptures:
Our soul is escaped as a bird out of the snare of the fowlers: the snare is broken, and we are escaped.
Psa 124:7 (KJV)
Now, let’s identify some sure signs that you may be in an emotionally abusive relationship.
1. Your Individuality is in question You are viewed as an extension of themselves rather than as an individual. Your opinions are disrespected and you are constantly reminded that without them, you are nothing. Your suggestions and ideas are trampled. When you find yourself in such, it is time to walk away.
2. Unending Chastisement You are corrected or chastised for your behaviors, almost all the time and publicly too. There is nothing you do that is right. Every word you speak is an error.
3. False Accusation You are dubbed “over-sensitive” in order that you can continue coping with the unending abuse and manipulations. You are constantly told to “grow up!”
To be continued tomorrow…
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY The eyes of my understanding are opened to see these signs.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, open the eyes of my understanding.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Pro 6:5 (KJV) Deliver thyself as a roe from the hand of the hunter, and as a bird from the hand of the fowler.
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Disconnect from every wrong relationship when you see these signs.
