Being calm in the face of anger and thinking about the situation is a great strength you can wield as a child. It’s also a sign that you are maturing into a balanced adult. When a person is saying words that you feel are offensive or carrying out actions that seem to offend you, ask if they are saying the truth. Seeking to know if their words are truthful can help you to understand certain things about yourself.
Giving thoughts to the words or actions of others before reacting or even after doing so helps you look inwards at yourself. You pick out the truths and apply them to your life and start making changes. Don’t look at how they said or did it – yes, it could be harsh, but look at the truth in what they are saying. You should be concerned about how to use the truths in their words and actions to better yourself.
Sometimes you could be the cause of why people do the things they do you. Are you a bully? Do you gossip about your friends? Are you a disloyal friend? Asking yourself such deep questions will lead you to the truth.
Even if you are not the cause of it, still remember to keep your cool and maintain your stand in Christ. There’s nothing to gain by retaliating with a quick outburst. Take a chill pill and let the Spirit of God teach you what to do; He is the Spirit of truth.
Finally, you can always pray to God for the grace to hold back your tongue and think before speaking; and to always speak in line with the truth when you speak.
“Lord, help me control my tongue. Help me be careful about what I say.” Psa. 143:3 ICB
Prayer:
Lord, help me learn from what people say or do to me. Show me where I am the problem. In Jesus’s name, Amen.
Action point: Take your time to listen when next someone angers you with their words or actions. Listen for the truth.
The first thing you want to do when someone says something bad or hurtful to you is to quickly reply. Well, that’s just you being human and everyone feels that way too. You are no exception; no natural self wants to turn the other cheek.
Rather than allowing your natural self to take over, why not just take a moment to calm down. Take some breaths if you remember to and slowly leave the place or just keep quiet. Turn the other cheek.
This doesn’t make you a fool or weak in any way. Rather, it shows maturity and that you have the Spirit of God working in you. Yeah, the fruit of the Spirit is working in you. One of such fruits is the fruit of love.
Out of love for God, you would rather not say something bad back to the person and instead, just walk away or keep quiet. If it’s a physical situation, you don’t retaliate, but rather turn the other cheek like Jesus said to do:
“You have heard that it was said, ‘An eye for an eye, and a tooth for a tooth.’ But I tell you, don’t stand up against an evil person. If someone slaps you on the right cheek, then turn and let him slap the other cheek too. Matthew 5:38 – 39 ICB
Turning the other cheek doesn’t mean you physically do that. It’s just a figure of speech that means you don’t act upon what the person said or did. You choose to obey God than man.
It can be hard to do, especially if there are others there who are goading to hit or speak back at the person. With practice and prayers to God for help, you will learn how to keep your peace; you will learn how to turn the other cheek.
May the Lord bless you with a spirit of love for Him. Amen
Prayer:
Lord, help me to be calm in situations that could get me angry. Teach me how to quickly let go of my anger. Teach me how to turn the other cheek. In Jesus’ name, amen.
Can yousee the possibility of a happy marriage. You have to believe that it’s possible, and tell yourself “I will have a happy marriage”, and then do the things necessary to have a happy marriage. We’ll continue from where we stopped yesterday
3. Never go to sleep with an argument.
An argument can occur between the couples at any time, on whatever issue, and in any particular place. However, it is maturity on the part of the couple not to spread the dirty linen outside for all to see.
It is maturity on the part of the husband to lovingly correct any mistake his wife does. She is not your daughter neither is she your maid or servant. She is your wife and covenant partner.
The wife is meant to respectfully suggest her opinion and ideas in such a way that it will not lead to an argument. That is maturity on her part.
Both husband and wife should be discerning enough to know when an argument is ensuring. They should also take note of their responses and how they react.
A soft answer is what the Bible recommends.
A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger. Proverbs 15:1 KJV
All couples should learn and practice how to answer softly.
Each couple must deal with anger. You cannot do marriage with anger
That is why it is important to deal with every unresolved issue. Every hurt, pain, unforgiveness will only lead to more unhealthy issues in marriage.
Every couple should be willing to fight for their marriage and be ready to walk in and by the Spirit. Only then can we be sure of not being carnal, judging issues rightly, having the right perspective, and being loving in our approach.
Finally, the bible says we should not let the sun go down on our anger. The life span of your anger shouldn’t be more than 24 hours
Be ye angry, and sin not: let not the sun go down upon your wrath: Neither give place to the devil. Ephesians 4:26 – 27 KJV
4. At least once a day, say something complimentary to your spouse.
If your spouse’s love language is words of affirmation, you will have to be very deliberate about complimenting him/her often. Your words mean a lot to your spouse and will often look to you for this need to be met.
You must be quick to look for virtues to celebrate, little baby steps to notice, efforts to acknowledge, and things to appreciate in your spouse.
Some temperaments don’t really need as many compliments and will do well even without a single compliment. You will do well not to judge or criticize your spouse if they need a lot of compliments.
However, as we mature, God should be our source of compliment and we should be secure in His word and promises to us and about us.
I will stop here for today. See you tomorrow by God’s Grace.
God grant us more understanding.
May God bless our marriage.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY My marriage will work.
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Lord, give me an understanding for my marriage in Jesus name.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY EPH 5:28 ESV In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Have a hearty discussion with your spouse today
