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There is nothing wrong with loving your wife or wife-to-be. There is nothing wrong with thinking about her. In fact, the scripture advises you to do that. Before you say hurray, however, there is a way you love your fiancée and there is a way you love your wife.

Let thy fountain be blessed: and rejoice with the wife of thy youth. Let her be as the loving hind and pleasant roe; let her breasts satisfy thee at all times; and be thou ravished always with her love (Proverbs 5:18-19 KJV)

This is talking to married people and not singles in courtship. It didn’t say, rejoice with the fiancée of thy youth or with your wife to be…

So verse 19 clearly establishes that God does not want you fondling and caressing each other. That is always the beginning of compromise.

When two people who are genuinely in love start petting each other, they will always do more and more each time they meet until they find themselves entangled in the web of compromise. It is called the law of progression and it happens all the time.

I know how your body feels when you are in love. I was once in love back then on the campus in the early nineties, and oh my God! Your body is mostly on fire!

You can continue to spiritualize it and deceive yourself that nothing can happen until you find yourself messing up. Or you can tell your fiancée, please, you have got to help me. I am in love with you and this is how my body feels. We must not compromise. Always caution me, if I am being inappropriate! And sometimes, it is the lady that needs to say that to the guy!

You see, when you do that, you are consciously protecting your destiny and preserving your relationship with God, which is what will make your relationship work out and lead to marriage!

How do you love a lady appropriately?

1. You are the protector of her body and her virtue
A good man will say from the very first day, “I love you dearly and because of that, I have a strong physical desire each time I see you, but we will not compromise. We will obey God’s principles in order that our courtship is protected. We will put our bodies under.

I will not allow my body to take charge and give me direction, I will allow my spirit to gain ascendancy and I will not lose my testimony. You make up your mind to wait and not compromise. That way, trust will be established and your intending marriage will be founded on a good foundation.

2. Never lift your hands against her
I have heard cases of singles in courtship that have been beaten severely by their fiancé. I have also had a few cases of ladies who slap the guys.

Well, you shouldn’t cope with any form of physical abuse on any level in your courtship. Don’t suffer silently thinking it will get better after marriage.

Deliver yourself like a bird and fly! If he is used to donating a few slaps here and there for you, and you still cling to him in sexual lust, something is seriously wrong. It is either he controls you with his money or there is a soul tie effected through pre-marital sex.

Whichever way, you need to deliver yourself quickly! Don’t go through all of life been treated like a doormat. You have a destiny to fulfill and don’t allow anybody to play the role of “God” in your life.

I am not being inappropriate. I know how to love my fiancee

Pray that God will give you the grace to always put your body under

For the ways of man are before the eyes of the Lord, and he pondereth all his goings. (Proverbs 5:21 KJV)

Decide how you want to love your fiancee

Num 3-4


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