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When Your Ex Won’t Let Go

Experiencing a breakup or divorce is not something anyone desires or looks forward to. As a matter of fact, God hates divorce, and it is not His best for His children. However, in some cases, it happens, and the aftermath of such events is usually filled with hurt, betrayal, pain, regret, and heartache. It doesn’t matter who is at fault; what’s essential is getting healed from every hurt. With God’s help, you can overcome the pain and come out stronger. In the name of Jesus, He will give you double for your trouble, and you will forget all your past hurts.

Here are five ways to handle your ‘Ex’ as a single or married person so that you can become a better person rather than a bitter one.

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When Your Ex Won’t Let Go

1. Acknowledge that the relationship has ended

Some people may hold onto the hope that something might happen to bring them back together. However, if your ‘Ex’ is not willing, there is nothing you can do to change that. Denial will only keep you stuck in the past, preventing you from moving forward. You need to let go of the past to embrace the new. Just like God recognized the death of Moses before Joshua could take over, you need to recognize that the relationship is over before you can move on.

When Your Ex Won’t Let Go

2. Minimize all forms of communication

You need to reduce all forms of communication to the barest minimum, such as visits, calls, chats, and texts. Maintaining contact with your ‘Ex’ can lead to double dating and cheating on your new partner, which will only cause more hurt and pain. Some ‘Exes’ might want to continue enjoying your company without committing to you. Don’t fall for this trap, as it will only waste your time and hurt you even more. Avoid checking their social media updates to keep up with their lives or getting jealous when you see them with someone else. Let them be and move on.

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When Your Ex Won’t Let Go

3. Learn from your past relationship

The best way to overcome the pain and hurt from a past relationship is to learn from it. Don’t let the devil have the last laugh by dwelling on the past. Take the time to reflect on the mistakes you made and learn from them. Don’t rush into another relationship or try to prove a point. Instead, go at God’s pace and ask yourself questions like What went wrong? What were the wrong choices I made? These questions are not meant to depress you but to make you wiser. Learn about human behavior and tendencies, how to treat a lover, and put God at the top of your priority list.

For those who have been married once, divorce should not be an option. However, in some cases, it may be necessary when there is violence and abuse involved or when reconciliation is no longer possible. In addition to the tips mentioned above, forgiveness is key to moving on. 

Bitterness will only crush you more, so get healed. Do not use your children as a tool to fight back, as this can plant bitterness in their hearts.

In Jesus’ name, I pray that God will give you the strength to fight for your marriage, and may He restore that which is lost and fill your mouth with laughter again.


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