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Understanding That Special Gender

1. Understand the God she serves
One of the sure ways to understand that special lady in your life is to seek to understand her maker.

Nobody understands a product like the manufacturer of that product. 

Nobody, no human being will ever understand her like God would.
So, the beginning of the journey is when the man develops a conscious relationship with God.
When you are rooted in God’s love, God will now cause His love to be shed abroad in your hearts.
As you begin to understand the breadth, the length and the depth and height of this love, this will give you a wisdom that surpasses every effort in trying to understand her, and you will know how to do the right things that will unlock her creativity and make her feel loved.

Eph 3:17-19 (KJV) 
That Christ may dwell in your hearts by faith; that ye, being rooted and grounded in love,  [18]  May be able to comprehend with all saints what is the breadth, and length, and depth, and height;  [19]  And to know the love of Christ, which passeth knowledge, that ye might be filled with all the fulness of God.

2. Understand the Needs she has
Her needs are specialized and peculiar.
They are different from your own needs.
From spiritual needs to physically needs and emotional needs, you have to find out!

You will immediately discover her preferences that what excites you on Television doesn’t not tickle her fancy! Find out and seek to meet those needs!
3. Understand the Language she speaks

Her language is like her password. It could be gifts, words of affirmation, quality time, physical touch or acts of service.

You don’t communicate to her on your own terms but on her own terms.
Find out her definition of “romantic” and go after that.
The definition of the word “romantic” is not what you find in a dictionary, but there is a dictionary in her mind with its own definition like no other, authored by her, and you have to find a way to retrieve that dictionary and check the definition which would often be different from what you think.

4. Understand the pressures she faces
She usually has pressures. Most times, she is not even seeking for those pressures to be taken away, because they are often necessities of life.
She just wants to know that there is somebody who understands what she is going though.
Many years ago, my wife explained this to me.
She was pouring her hearts to me, and expounding her pressures and at a point I burst out;
“Hey! I am not the Holy Spirit. I cannot take these things away!”
“And then she looked at me with that her angelic face that often makes my heart to race, and said,
“I know you are not the Holy Spirit. I am not asking you to solve these issues, I only want to have a feeling somebody understands what I am going through!
Wow! That is what that lady in your life wants! An understanding heart.
And that takes the pressures off the pressures!
She just wants an understanding, loving and caring man!

Unfortunately, most times, single ladies look for this in wrong places and often fall into the hands of men who are only looking for sexual gratification.
If you are a single lady, make your needs known to God and never offer your body in exchange for some care that will vaporise the next minute!
Wait for the process of meeting that right man who will love you appropriately and will take care of you!

May God grant you strength in your inner man to cooperate with God. 
So, I will stop here this morning.

Ultimately, pray for wisdom from God to help you be a good lover to your fiancée or spouse in very specific ways.
The Holy Spirit teaches us all things, so he would offer you some ideas.
I pray that God will give you wisdom in Jesus name!


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