Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge. – Heb 13:4 (KJV)
Marriage is an institution that has existed for thousands of years. It’s a union between two people who commit themselves to one another in the most intimate and personal way possible. The fact that it’s lasted this long suggests there is something about marriage itself that we value. But what, exactly?
Here are a few thoughts on what makes a good marriage.
A good marriage is based on respect
A good marriage is based on respect. Respect is a two-way street. It means that each partner respects the other person’s feelings and opinions, as well as their own.
This doesn’t mean that couples are never at odds with one another. Conflict is inevitable in any healthy relationship, but it should never be allowed to escalate into disrespect of one another.
The partners need to be open to speaking frankly with one another, while also listening attentively to one another and understanding the other person’s perspective or point of view.
Communication is key
It sounds very cliché, but it’s true: communication is key to achieving a good marriage. You have to talk to each other and work on the problems together.
There’s nothing worse than being married and not knowing what your spouse feels like because they don’t talk to you.
One of the most important aspects of a successful marriage is good communication.
There are many ways to communicate, but it’s particularly important for both parties to share their feelings and thoughts with one another.
For example, if one partner feels neglected and begins to withdraw from the relationship, it’s vital that they tell the other person how they feel.
Communication creates understanding and can help prevent problems before they escalate.
To have a good marriage, you need to be committed
The commitment is the key ingredient for a good marriage. Successful marriages are about two people who are willing to commit to one another and work together through the good times and bad times.
It’s also so important that both partners are committed to the relationship. If one person isn’t committed, then it could doom the marriage from the start.
A good marriage isn’t perfect
The first thing to keep in mind about marriage is that it’s not perfect. Even when two people are deeply committed to one another, there will be times where you disagree and times where you might feel unhappy. But with a good marriage, these disagreements are just part of the process.
In fact, research suggests that a marriage can grow stronger after a disagreement has taken place because the couple knows they have each other’s back. This type of relationship is better able to withstand the inevitable challenges life throws at it.
Marriage is work
Marriage is work. It’s not just a piece of paper you sign to make it valid. Marriage takes commitment and sacrifice – but the rewards are worth it.
You have to make time for one another
Marriage is all about commitment, and making time for one another is a big part of it. Too many couples put everything else in their lives ahead of their significant others. That’s not what marriage is about! You need to make time for your spouse or you will lose them.
Love is also an important aspect of a good marriage. If you don’t love each other, get divorced. Marriage should be about more than just living together and having kids. It should be about loving each other unconditionally and doing whatever you can to make the other person happy.
Lastly, take care of yourself as well as your spouse, do things that make you happy without feeling guilty!
This will help ensure that your marriage lasts longer because it won’t feel like a burden or obligation anymore.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY My marriage is a blessing
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Oh Lord, do a miracle in my marriage today.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge. – Heb 13:4 (KJV)
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Put the above points to use.
The Answer is No! You can marry an imperfect person because nobody is perfect. Nobody! We are all a work in progress.
But wait… let’s make some clarifications.
An imperfect person is not someone who is living in an unrepentant habitual sin, sinning willfully and enjoying the pleasures of sin.
In other words, I am saying, you cannot marry someone who is living consistently in habitual sin, with no remorse or repentance. Such a person is going get you into trouble and drag you into misery.
About being imperfect, the scriptures lets us know we will get better as we stay in the word, study the word, pray in the Spirit and pay attention to the things of the Spirit.
Is your lover doing all these?
Check the scriptures:
But we all, with open face beholding as in a glass the glory of the Lord, are changed into the same image from glory to glory, even as by the Spirit of the Lord.
2Co 3:18 (KJV)
Again we see here:
And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God.
Rom 12:2 (KJV)
We are promised a change as we pay attention to the word. This is entirely different from a habitual sinner. He is not interested in changing or getting better in God.
He may profess interest in change with his mouth, but his heart is far from that. He or she is not interested in God’s word, he is only religious, he goes to church.
He is a serial fornicator. He plays sport with sin. The Bible warns against such people.
Here are some clear instructions:
But now I have written unto you not to keep company, if any man that is called a brother be a fornicator, or covetous, or an idolater, or a railer, or a drunkard, or an extortioner; with such an one no not to eat.
1Co 5:11 (KJV)
You are not to be friends with such people not to talk of getting married to such because they probably have some money.
Amplified Bible puts it this way:
But now I write to you not to associate with anyone who bears the name of [Christian] brother if he is known to be guilty of immorality or greed, or is an idolater [whose soul is devoted to any object that usurps the place of God], or is a person with a foul tongue [railing, abusing, reviling, slandering], or is a drunkard or a swindler or a robber. [No] you must not so much as eat with such a person.
1Co 5:11 (AMPC)
Again take a look at the Message translation:
But I am saying that you shouldn’t act as if everything is just fine when one of your Christian companions is promiscuous or crooked, is flip with God or rude to friends, gets drunk or becomes greedy and predatory. You can’t just go along with this, treating it as acceptable behavior.
1Co 5:11 (MSG)
Let’s take a look at one more scriptures and I will rest my case:
I wrote you in my earlier letter that you shouldn’t make yourselves at home among the sexually promiscuous.  I didn’t mean that you should have nothing at all to do with outsiders of that sort. Or with crooks, whether blue- or white-collar. Or with spiritual phonies, for that matter. You’d have to leave the world entirely to do that!  But I am saying that you shouldn’t act as if everything is just fine when one of your Christian companions is promiscuous or crooked, is flip with God or rude to friends, gets drunk or becomes greedy and predatory. You can’t just go along with this, treating it as acceptable behavior.
1Co 5:9-11 (MSG)
I will have to stop here this morning.
May God grant you more understanding!
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I will hearken to God’s voice. I will work on myself till I am perfect.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Pray that God will perfect you
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY 1Co 5:11 (GW) Now, what I meant was that you should not associate with people who call themselves brothers or sisters in the Christian faith but live in sexual sin, are greedy, worship false gods, use abusive language, get drunk, or are dishonest. Don’t eat with such people.
There is something called the will of God, which is usually divided into the perfect will and the permissive will. The best we should aim for is the perfect will of God.
And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.
Rom 12:2 (NKJV)
Children, let your mind be renewed. The best way to do this is by putting the law of God in your heart.
I delight to do your will, O my God; your law is within my heart.”
Psalm 40:8 (ESV)
Children, to really enjoy God’s blessings and to align with God’s purpose for your lives, you must delight to do the will of God.
His will is not burdensome. He simply expects us to do as written in the word. Part of his will is to honor your parents.
Children, obey your parents in the Lord for this is right. “Honor your father and mother,” which is the first commandment accompanied by a promise, namely, “that it may go well with you and that you will live a long time on the earth.”
Eph 6:1-3 (NET)
You must strive to always please Him in all ways. When you seek Him first, every other thing shall be added unto you.
But let your first care be for his kingdom and his righteousness; and all these other things will be given to you in addition.
Matt 6:33 (BBE)
Prayer: My children seek to do God’s will. They put God first in Jesus name. Amen
My children delight to do God’s will always. They obey His dictates. They live to please Him always.
Action Plan: Decide in your heart to do the perfect will of God.