How To Build Intimacy Intentionally. This is a very interesting topic and I hope we all are ready to learn one or two things. For our marriage to work and be blissful, we have to invest in knowledge. Knowledge is very important in the issue of marriage.
Men and women are so different. We have to humble ourselves to learn and keep on learning.
The whole concept of marriage is for intimacy. Intimacy simply means “into me see, into my needs, or a deep connection between spouses”. It is when two people become one flesh.
Gen 2:23 -25 And Adam said: “This is now bone of my bones And flesh of my flesh; She shall be called Woman, Because she was taken out of Man.” Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.
Many people build their marriage on different things e.g. kids, career, fame, ministry, and so on, whereas we should build our marriages on our relationships with one another.
The kids will grow and go, what happens to our relationship with each other?
Marriage is meant to survive anything where there is intimacy. It can survive infertility, infidelity, lack, poverty, health challenges, or interference. Interference of in-laws or third parties thrives in a marriage without intimacy.
The bond and covenant of marriage are strong enough to withstand any of these pressures.
When we build intimacy in our marriage that’s when we begin to enjoy the rewards of unity. Where we begin to have great rewards, we begin to chase 10,000 more as a couple.
How do we build intimacy in our relationship? Let’s look at the acronym ‘INTIMACY’.
How To Build Intimacy Intentionally
1. INTENTIONAL
We cannot build intimacy in our marriage without being intentional. We don’t become one at the altar on the wedding day. We are pronounced ‘one’ and then go through the process of becoming one which involves the two spouses.
No marriage suddenly breaks; couples gradually drift apart.
Love can die. If love can grow then it can also die. We have to be intentional about keeping love ablaze.
As powerful as fire is, something has to keep it burning. Such is the passion of love. We start a marriage with emotional love where we love almost unconsciously.
As the marriage grows, we need to be intentional and conscious about loving our spouses, knowing them, meeting their deepest needs, and being there for them.
Good couples become intimate by chance but great couples become intimate by choice. This is How To Build Intimacy Intentionally
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I am intentional about being intimate with my spouse. I am careful to notice what their needs are and I meet those needs.
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Help me Lord to grow in my intimacy with my spouse.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY And Adam said: “This is now bone of my bones And flesh of my flesh; She shall be called Woman, Because she was taken out of Man.” Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh”. Gen 2:23-24 NKJV
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Be intentional about being intimate with your spouse. Seek to know what love language your spouse is speaking par time and meet their needs.
BIBLE READING FOR THE DAY Gen 2
Rev. Sophia Okunowo
Giving / Partnership
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We have been considering several levels of communication in the last few days. We have looked at
1. The Hallway talker
2. Reporter’s Talk
3. Intellectual Talk
4. Emotional Talk.
This morning, we will be considering the last and highest level of Communication.
5. Loving, Genuine Truth Talk
‘Let’s Be Honest’.
This level allows us to speak the truth in love. It is a place of honesty without condemnation.
Most couples are finding out that such open, honest and loving communication enhances a much deeper level of intimacy, where couples can share their feelings and thoughts without feeling unsafe. Both have a sense of safety and security. This requires an attitude of acceptance.
You know your spouse understands you even if they don’t agree with you.
We can always agree to disagree without shaming ourselves or making us look less smart. We can have differing opinions and still be friends. No hurts, no guilt, no condemnation and we are still good to go.
We can’t be the same. Remember, acceptance is the key.
We may start out on the first level of communication, but please, don’t let us remain there.
As a couple, we should aim at moving higher in the way we relate, understand, and communicate with each other. This will require a certain level of work and being intentional about getting to understand your spouse.
The higher we grow in our level of communicating with ourselves, the more intimate we grow with our spouse.
I pray God will grant us wisdom and grace and help us all to communicate better in Jesus name.
God bless our marriage
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY My marriage will be a blessing to many
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Oh Lord, teach me how to communicate effectively
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Call unto me, and I will answer thee, and shew thee great and mighty things, which thou knowest not. –Jeremiah 33:3 (KJV)
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Pray in the Spirit
BIBLE READING FOR THE DAY Job 23-25
Rev. Sophia Okunowo
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Deposits: Kisses and Huggs Club MONIEPOINT: 8247660079 GTB:0150088032
A person who is emotionally unavailable would want to start a relationship in a rather too fast way.
Hours after meeting, he is already laying the sheets on the bed. Hours after meeting each other, she is already giving you body language that she is all for the take!
The guy feels lucky that he just met a sexually willing babe. Well, he just met a confused soul who wants to use him to deaden the pain in her heart.
A guy who is not really in love and has no emotional connection often times just wants the jeru trip. He is not emotionally available.
What you need to know is that for a relationship to work properly, there needs to be a development flow. But when you try to bypass the natural rhythm of intimacy, there will be relationship chaos!
An emotionally unavailable person wants the sexual phase of the relationship to happen quickly, but we all know that this is a phase that God wants to be reserved till the time of marriage.
I am going to stop here this morning, but before I go, a word for the married.
Did you miss out on yesterday’s devotional, we’ve got you covered. Kindly go HERE. For KHC video Devotionals, kindly go HERE
In marriage, make sure nothing steals times of intimacy building between the two of you. Never allow any other person apart from your spouse into your emotional space!
Your emotional space is only for your spouse and any other person is an “alien” that will do damage to your heart. Block out every emotional opening and space to colleagues, boss, friends, and even your pastors! Let all the emotional space be taken by your spouse only!
That is how to be on safe ground!
May God grant more understanding in Jesus name!
I pray for all who might just be going through the process of emotional healing, I ask that God will touch your heart and grant you the grace to forgive and let go in Jesus name!
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I will not be a wreck to my lover
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Lord, help me to be emotionally stable
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Rom 14:17(MSG) God’s kingdom isn’t a matter of what you put in your stomach, for goodness’ sake. It’s what God does with your life as he sets it right, puts it together, and completes it with joy.
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Heal from the past before moving to the next
BIBLE READING FOR THE DAY Rom 14
Rev Dunamis Okunowo
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We are in a very significant year as I have heard so many people say a lot of things about this season. This year, we have to prepare to walk into greatness. There is no accidental success and no growth is a coincidence.
We have to prepare our ways if we must see any significant positive changes in our lives and families. Twelve months is a lot of time. You could start this year having nothing and in twelve months, have kids, have a business of your own, move into your own house, and be doing something significant in the nation.
All these come as a result of the blessing (if it must be true prosperity). The blessing however has to be activated. We activate the blessing by walking in certain principles of the kingdom.
As couples, you have to make up your minds and do so early enough. You cannot continue to do things you used to do and expect a different result. There must be significant changes in your approach and attitudes.
Did you miss out on yesterday’s devotional, we’ve got you covered kindly go HERE. For KHC video Devotionals kindly go HERE
No more compromises! No to living life haphazardly! No to prayerlessness! No to the works of the flesh, works of unrighteousness! No to not paying of tithes! No to lack of intimacy with God!
You decide to say yes to a life that honors God! Yes to living to please God! Yes to seeking to know God! Yes to hearing the voice of God! Yes to a life of Obedience!
If you do all these, you will be preparing your way into significance.
Remember, God has a purpose for you and your marriage. Carry your spouse along and you will see yourself walk into Glory.
May God grant us grace in Jesus name.
God bless our marriages.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY No more compromise. No, not me.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Help me Lord to be faithful to my marriage covenant
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Prov 6:2 [NKJV] You are snared by the words of your mouth; You are taken by the words of your mouth.
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Take your spouse out
BIBLE READING FOR THE DAY Jos 6
Rev. Sophia Okunowo
Giving / Partnership
Deposits: Kisses and Huggs Club MONIEPOINT: 8247660079 GTB:0150088032
This is a very relevant topic to all people who are married. We all belong to one of these groups in our marriage.
a. Your intimacy is good and needs little improvement
b. Your intimacy is just there and you want a fast revival
c. Your intimacy is bad and you are close to compromising
d. You are enjoying your intimacy
e. Your intimate life is very dry and boring and you are bothered
f. Your intimacy is not good and you don’t care.
g. Your intimate life is bad and you are settling yourself outside.
Did you miss out on yesterday’s devotional, we’ve got you covered kindly go HERE. For KHC video Devotionals kindly go HERE
Every couple must fall under one of these seven categories. Five of these categories are very bad and need urgent attention.
You must keep the flames in the bedroom red hot. The health of a marriage is largely dependent on the health of the bedroom.
Wives, don’t use love-making as a reward system for your husband, whereby when he is good and you are happy with him, you give him your body. You are not a prostitute who gives sex for reward.
Deal with every issue before they are allowed to cripple your love life.
Intimacy is first of the heart before it becomes of the body. All inhibitions must be taken off your marriage until you both become naked and not ashamed.
Close all doors to the enemy and swallow your pride. You cannot be full of yourself and expect things to work out. Some wives issue out commands to their husbands just so that they can make love to them. They become lord of the rings.
Don’t leave your matrimonial bed. Don’t sleep in different rooms, it will not work. Pray for whatever flaws he/ she has. Don’t judge or criticize your spouse to the point of rejecting them.
Whatever the issue, you are married. Save your marriage before it is too late. Forgive yourselves and embrace each other. Your marriage can still work out beautifully well.
God bless your marriage!
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I will enjoy my marriage.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, help me to satisfy my spouse at all times.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY 1 Corinthians 13:4 Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up,
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Take your spouse to “Jerusalem”
BIBLE READING FOR THE DAY 1 cor 13
Rev. Sophia Okunowo
Giving / Partnership
Deposits: Kisses and Huggs Club MONIEPOINT: 8247660079 GTB:0150088032
