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It’s beautiful seeing newly wedded couples. The love spark is amazing.

There is a love wave, love current and all the love vibes around them. They set out professing their eternal love for each other.

They are deeply in love and could never imagine hurting each other not to talk of harming themselves whether emotionally or verbally.

The question is what happened? At what point did they start to deviate from the love zone?

Really, no husband or wife starts out over night from being loving to being rash, unkind, abusive and insensitive.

There must have been little actions or in-actions here and there, that crept into their love affair.

The Bible talks about little foxes that destroy the vine, the tender vine.

Our marriages are like these vines that are very tender. Little foxes are like poisons slowly released that will eventually destroy the marriage. We therefore, need to place close attention so that we don’t allow these foxes.

Here are three things not to do if you want to keep love alive in marriage.

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1 Don’t blame

‘It’s his fault’
‘She very disrespectful’
‘He’s not kind and loving’
She’s lazy and overly sensitive’
‘He’s always hurting’

Stop the blame game. You have a choice, either you keep blaming and remain hurt, bitter and full of regret and revengeful.

When you keep on blaming the other person you focus on their negatives.

You become blind to their positive sides and you put him/ her on edge.

Remember, when you were in love, it was because you were blind to their negatives and only focused on how good, handsome & lovely they were.

Do the same now. Blaming your spouse continuously is poisonous.

I am not asking you to keep completely silent on your spouse’s weakness but rather confront each other respectfully and lovingly.

Remember you have your own faults too. Forgiveness and mercy is reciprocal in marriage.

To be continued tomorrow

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