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One basic ingredient that makes relationships work out is understanding.

Even after the will of God is known and you are sure this person is God’s perfect will for you, you still have to live to understanding each other.

Understanding is like the Space Suit the astronauts wear to make them survive in space. The atmospheric condition in space requires a special outfit that will sustain them there.

Here on earth you can survive with your tuxedo suit but not in the space.

It is therefore imperative for people in relationships to seek after understanding.

First the understanding of the relationship from God’s perspective and then seeking to understand yourselves.

Little wonder the Bible says in

Pro 4:7
Wisdom is the principal thing; therefore get wisdom: and with all thy getting get understanding.

God is telling you, get wisdom, now that you have gotten engaged, get understanding.

Without understanding and wisdom, the courtship becomes like a court where there are always arguments, criticisms, being judgmental, and the likes.

To understand yourselves you have to have basic knowledge of your temperamental differences, man and woman differences, background differences, and the personality uniqueness of each other.

For us when we were courting back then in the early nineties, once we read the book on temperament by Tim LaHaye, our level of understanding increased.

Things that used to get us angry before simply didn’t anymore because now we could understand the reason behind certain behaviors.

Now, it wasn’t that we explained away our weaknesses and character flaws, we confronted ourselves but with love and respect.

The understanding we gained just gave us another perspective helping us to see each other from a better viewpoint.

Really, love is spelt understanding.

You cannot love who or what you don’t understand.

Understanding makes it easier for you to love.

You don’t love on your own terms, you love on God’s terms and on the other persons terms.

1Co 13:4
Love endures long and is patient and kind; love never is envious nor boils over with jealousy, is not boastful or vainglorious, does not display itself haughtily.

Love basically is patient and kind.

Without understanding, you can’t be patient and kind with your lover.

May God grant you understanding in understanding your loved one in Jesus name.

May your relationship be blessed in Jesus name.

This week will be fruitful for you in Jesus name!

I have the spirit of understanding

Lord, open the eyes of my understanding 

Job 32:8 (KJV) But there is a spirit in man: and the inspiration of the Almighty giveth them understanding.

Pray for understanding

Haggai 2


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