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The Indispensable Need for Forgiveness

God’s word remains the only authentic manual for living a fruitful married life and indeed every other aspect of our lives

Marriage is not meant to be lived without God. How do you get God involved in your marriage except by finding out of His word says in every different aspect?

The issue of forgiveness is very crucial in marriage. We must guide ourselves on how to handle hurts and offenses such that they don’t degenerate into bitterness and finally get to a point where your spirit is closed against your spouse.

Marriage is a union that is meant to multiply our strength. One is meant to chase a thousand and two of us in marriage put ten thousand to flight.

Yet marriage is the place where most offenses occur, mostly because of temperamental differences, background differences, and male/ female differences.

Pressures of different sorts occur in marriage. Unmet expectations, challenges, and changes happen in marriage and all these cause the very foundation of our marriage to be shaken.  Arming ourselves with the right knowledge and getting the strength to help us navigate this aspect of our marital journey is very important.

That hurts will not come is living in a fool’s paradise. Let’s look at what God’s word says 

2 Cor 6:3 Giving no offence in anything, … We are to make sure we are not easily offended. Don’t easily be offended. Grow a thick skin to being offended. Holding offenses is not  even good for our health. 

Learn to let go quickly.  I know it is not an easy pill to swallow. I also know, that depending on the magnitude of the offense, it becomes really hard to let go. Yet God’s word must be obeyed.

Matt 18:7 Woe unto the world because of offences! for it must needs be that offences come; but woe to that man by whom the offence cometh! 

Offenses MUST come. This is a reality in marriage.  We are not expecting it but we are armed with how to handle offenses quickly when they show up.

I think that is a fair way to live.

Let’s look at what God’s word has to say about forgiveness

Matt 6:15 But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses 

If we don’t forgive from our hearts, we stand the risk of having God holding our shortcomings against us. We are always in need of the mercy of God. So one of the reasons we forgive our spouse is because we also offend God in so many ways and want Him to forgive us. God counts it sheer wickedness, if we want God to forgive us and yet we withhold mercy from our covenant partner.  Forgiveness is a show of Mercy that we give to the offender.  When we show mercy to others we will also receive mercy. 

I will stop here this morning. It is my prayer that God will grant us the Grace to forgive each other in marriage in Jesus’ mighty name.


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