Dear singles and couples, let’s have a heart-to-heart talk about something that really matters – finding your purpose, not just in life, but in the realms of before and after you say “I do.” Whether you’re single, engaged, or already hooked, understanding your purpose is like having a compass that guides you through the stormy and sunny days of life.
Before Marriage: Discovering Yourself
1. Discover Yourself: Before you can share your life with someone, it’s crucial to know who you are. What lights your fire? What are your passions, values, and dreams? This isn’t just about career or hobbies; it’s about understanding your core. Why are you here? What is your purpose?
2. Build Your Relationship with God: Your faith isn’t just a part of your life; it’s the lens through which you see the world. Strengthening your relationship with God helps clarify your purpose and aligns your path with His plans. He created young so the template of your life is with Him.
3. Serve Others: Service isn’t just a nice thing to do; it’s a way to discover aspects of yourself and your purpose. Whether it’s volunteering at church or helping out in the community, service expands your heart and your understanding of where you fit in this world. When you serve, He said he will bless your bread and water!
After Marriage: Growing Together
1. Unite Your Dreams: Now that you’re a team, it’s time to align your purposes. This doesn’t mean giving up your individual dreams but finding ways they can complement and support each other. Be on the same page in your respective areas of specialization. Allow two chasing ten thousand rather than as individuals chasing a thousands each.
2. What’s Your Vision?: What do you want your marriage to stand for? Together, create a vision that includes not just your goals as a couple but also how you want to contribute to the world around you. Create a vision board for your family and that will help you keep focus.
3. Keep God at the Center: As you navigate married life, keeping your faith central can help you face challenges and make decisions that honor your shared purpose. Need stop reading and studying your Bible! Pray in the Spirit a lot and allow God to build your family for you!
Remember, finding and fulfilling your purpose is a journey, not a destination. It’s about growing, learning, and adapting, whether you’re single, engaged, or married.
So, take a deep breath, trust in God’s plan, and embark on this beautiful adventure of discovering and living out your purpose.
Nothing grows romantic love like being quick to forgive. When we see that we are drifting away from our sweet spot, forgiveness does the magic. Notwithstanding who is at fault. Just taking the initiative to say ‘I’m sorry’ first does the trick. It is maturity. Say sorry first, and you win.
Whenever you swallow your pride for the sake of growing your romantic love, you win.
As singles, forgiveness is a constant in a relationship. Practice and learn forgiving the one you love. Don’t count scores. Your flesh will want to pay back evil for evil, tit for tat. Learn to be more like Christ. Let your romantic love grow to be more patient and kind, gentle, not boastful, not envious.
In marriage, the Lord warns us never to allow strife.
I think it is in marriage that most offense happens. Your spouse will step on your toes and still justify their actions.
Opposites truly attract, but with time, they begin to repel. Don’t let animosity fester. Apologize when your spouse is angry at you. Little things may anger your spouse; don’t rationalize, don’t be logical about how or why he/she should be angry, just apologize.
An apology is not about who is wrong but about having feelings for the one who is pained.
5. Appreciation
These two words, ‘thank you,’ grow your romantic love towards each other. It shows your sensitivity to the needs of your partner to be appreciated.
As singles, never take your partner for granted. This understanding is very necessary if you want your romantic love to grow in a healthy way and not be stunted.
Remember that it is a privilege for your partner to be nice, kind, good, forgiving, hardworking, thoughtful, neat, punctual, and the list of good virtues and qualities goes on and on.
Appreciate whatever good you see and recognize in your partner. When it comes to looking at their good qualities, look at it with a magnifying lens. Don’t let their good deeds be little in your eyes.
Remember, whatever you appreciate, appreciates. Whatever you don’t appreciate, depreciates.
As couples, make appreciation a big deal. Celebrate your spouse for the simplest things. Never take them for granted.
Many single ladies and guys are finding it difficult to know who the perfect will of God is for them. The guy is cool, and the ladies seem pleasant but is he/she the one God has in mind for me?
This is one of the questions that has bothered the singles ever since, at least those that fear the Lord.
Some other carnal believers just think, ‘I am the one marrying here not God, so let me choose what I like and I will be good’. Nothing is farther from the truth than this.
For us married folk, I used to think, but we have the Holy Spirit and He knows all things but why are we not led by Him all the time? Especially in our marital affairs.
The answer is in the state of our mind.
It is our privilege as born-again believers to be led by the Holy Spirit. That is what distinguishes us from unbelievers. That is our ‘X’ factor. And you know what, whether you are single or married, the Holy Spirit delights to lead us.
Romans 8:14 NIV For those who are led by the Spirit of God are the children of God.
The problem is in the state of our minds. The Holy Spirit has information, wisdom, and strategies He wants to download to us, but our minds are too busy. He wants to tell us things, secrets about our spouses, about our intended partners.
We will however not be able to receive this leading because our minds are too busy. There is the normal state of mind, which is serene, calm and quiet. There is the abnormal state which is busy, filled with worries, evil thoughts, doubts, etc
God can only lead us in our relationship and marriage affairs if our mind is stayed on Him.
Isaiah 26:3 NIV You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast, because they trust in you.
Isaiah 26:3 AMPC You will guard him and keep him in perfect and constant peace whose mind [both its inclination and its character] is stayed on You, because he commits himself to You, leans on You, and hopes confidently in You.
The Amplified Classic translation explains it well. God will only guard and guide us with His peace which is the umpire that tells us we are on the right track when choosing who we are to marry.
He will guide us with His peace when we know that the Holy Spirit is teaching us what to do in our marriage.
Our minds have to be stayed on the Word. We have to discipline our minds for it not to be wandering.
Our minds have to be focused on meditating on the word. If we want to enjoy the leading of the Holy Spirit, we have to actively keep our minds pondering, thinking, contemplating on His word, worship, and praying.
To know the voice of the Holy Spirit, we need to be ‘used’ to how He speaks.
Be disciplined with your mind. Think about what you are thinking about. Be quick to keep your mind stayed on the word. Keep your mind in worship, thinking of God’s goodness and His wondrous works. Plead the blood of Jesus on your mind to cleanse it from every dead works of unrighteousness.
Let your mind be free enough for the Holy Spirit to communicate with you and you being able to receive whatever He wants to say.
We live in a world of constant noise – pings from social media, pressure to keep up with the latest trends, and an unrelenting expectation to be everything to everyone. It’s easy to get lost in that chaos, losing sight of who we truly are. Whether you’re single or married, there’s one prayer that strikes a chord deep within: “Lord, Deliver Me From Me.”
Psa 139:23 (MSG) Investigate my life, O God, find out everything about me; Cross-examine and test me, get a clear picture of what I’m about;
We’ve all been there, staring at our reflection, wondering why we can’t just be a little more like this or a little less like that. In our pursuit of perfection, we become our own harshest critics and biggest roadblocks. But here’s a liberating truth: It’s okay not to have it all figured out. It’s okay to be a work in progress, constantly evolving and growing.
For the singles out there, society often makes it seem like you’re on a ticking clock, that you need to have your life mapped out with a fairy-tale ending. But guess what? Your worth isn’t tied to your relationship status. Your journey is uniquely yours, and it’s not a race against anyone else. Praying “Lord, deliver me from me” is a powerful way to let go of those self-imposed pressures and anxieties. It’s about asking God to help you embrace your singleness as a season of growth, discovery, and self-love. Being single isn’t a waiting room for happiness; it’s a chapter where you get to write the rules, discover your passions, and build an unshakable relationship with yourself and God.
Now’s your golden chance to dive into what makes you tick, explore new hobbies, and figure out your dreams – just you, no plus one needed. Use this solo time to get tight with God, finding out who you are in His eyes, which is pretty amazing and so much bigger than just being someone’s other half. Don’t just solo it; build your tribe of friends, family, and mentors – these connections are priceless. Got goals? Now’s the time to chase them down, whether it’s your career or learning something new. And most importantly, take care of your heart and mind, and find joy in your own company.
For the married folks, this prayer is equally potent. Marriage is a beautiful dance of togetherness and individuality, but it’s easy to lose yourself in the duo. “Lord, deliver me from me” is a heartfelt plea to maintain your essence while being an integral part of a union. It’s about asking for the grace to grow together without losing sight of who you are as individuals. It’s a prayer for patience, understanding, and the strength to be your partner’s ally, not their adversary. Remember, your marriage is as unique as a fingerprint, and there’s no one-size-fits-all formula. Embrace your journey, with all its twists and turns, and know that it’s okay to be imperfectly perfect.
Just because you’re hooked doesn’t mean you vanish into the “we” – keep that awesome “you” shining bright. Picture your marriage like a bike ride; you both get to steer and enjoy the view. Living with your lover means patience is your new best friend. Think of your spouse as your co-conspirator in this adventure of life, not the opponent you need to outwit or outlast. Embrace the one-of-a-kind life you two are living together, and enjoy it!
Whether you’re single or married, young or old, the prayer “Lord, Deliver Me From Me” is a powerful reminder that we’re not alone in our struggles. It’s an acknowledgment that sometimes, the person we need to be delivered from is ourselves. So, let’s take a deep breath and step into this journey with open hearts. Let’s be kind to ourselves, embrace our flaws, and celebrate our victories, no matter how small. After all, life isn’t about having all the answers; it’s about trusting the One who does. Remember, you’re not alone. We’re all in this together, learning, growing, and finding our way. And in those moments when you feel overwhelmed, just whisper that simple yet profound prayer, “Lord, Deliver Me From Me,” and watch as peace fills your heart and guides your steps.
Once upon a time, in a bustling city filled with bright lights and fast-paced lives, there lived a young couple named Buddy and Stella.
They were deeply in love and committed to building a relationship grounded in understanding and connection.
One evening, as they sat on the rooftop of their house, Stella shared her dreams and aspirations with Buddy.
Instead of merely hearing her words, Buddy decided to listen truly. He put away his phone, looked into Stella’s eyes, and let her pour out her heart. He nodded, smiled, and used his body language to show he was fully present and engaged.
When Stella finished speaking, Buddy took a moment to gather his thoughts. He summarized and rephrased what she had shared, ensuring he understood her correctly.
Stella’s face lit up with excitement. She felt truly seen and understood by Buddy’s active listening. It made her feel valued and cherished, knowing that he was genuinely interested in her passions and dreams.
They delved into conversations about life, faith, and their shared purpose. Questions like, “What impact do you hope to make in the world?” and “What are your wildest dreams and how can I support you in achieving them?” became the fuel for their connection.
In moments of vulnerability, they acknowledged each other’s emotions, just as Jesus did with compassion and understanding.
When Buddy faced setbacks in his career, Stella listened without judgment, providing a safe space for him to express his frustrations. And when Stella experienced self-doubt in her emotions, Buddy offered unwavering support and reminded her of her inner strength!
Most importantly, Buddy and Stella learned to avoid interruptions and assumptions. They realized that true understanding required patience and the willingness to hear each other out completely. They were quick to listen and slow to speak, just as the Scriptures advised.
Their love story continued to flourish as they embraced the art of radical listening. Their relationship became a haven of trust, where they could freely express themselves and find solace in the other’s understanding.
They discovered that active listening was the key to unlocking a love that transcends generations—a love that speaks the language of the heart and nurtures the souls of both singles and couples.
And so, their love story continues to inspire others, reminding them of the power of radical listening. This power can ignite flames of love and understanding in the hearts of a generation yearning for authentic connection.
For Singles:
Are you actively practicing radical listening in your friendships and potential romantic relationships? How can you incorporate the principles of active listening into your interactions?
What are your deepest passions, dreams, and aspirations? How can you find someone who will truly listen and support you in pursuing those dreams?
Reflecting on your past relationships, were there instances where active listening could have made a positive difference? How can you improve your listening skills in future relationships?
For Couples:
How well do you currently practice active listening in your relationship? Are there areas where you can improve to foster deeper understanding and connection?
What open-ended questions can you ask your partner to foster meaningful conversations and explore each other’s dreams and aspirations?
How do you acknowledge and validate each other’s emotions in moments of vulnerability? Are there any specific ways you can enhance your empathy and support for each other?
For Singles and Couples:
Reflecting on the story, what is one action you can take today to become a more active and empathetic listener in your relationships?
How can you create intentional moments of undistracted listening with your partner or potential partner?
Are there any assumptions or interruptions that you need to be more mindful of in your communication? How can you practice being quick to listen and slow to speak?
