Anger Management Hacks: 10 Surprising Ways To Keep Your Cool
Good morning! Today, I want to speak directly to both singles and married couples. There are things in life that work, and there are things that do not. You don’t need to spend another five years experimenting to figure out what works and what doesn’t. All you need is a willingness to learn. Every mistake you make has the potential to harden your heart against God, which is a tactic of the devil. Life is not meant to be permanently lived on Mistake Street by Error Avenue. Instead, you can choose to pursue wisdom and allow past mistakes to teach and instruct you.
You gain wisdom from God’s word and also from His anointed ones. Here are a few things you should take note of.
1. Be Slow to Get Angry
This is what the scripture expressly advises. Many have lost precious relationships because of anger tantrums. It’s okay to get angry sometimes as a human; I get angry myself sometimes. But when your anger becomes compulsive, uncontrollable, and borders on violence, you need to be careful. When it comes to anger, apply the super slow-motion button!
2. Managing Anger
Pray to God for Help: If you find yourself getting angry to the point of beating people, picking fights, or destroying things, you need to consciously pray to God for help.
3. Seek Resources
Go online and search for ‘anger management’ to find materials that can help you.
4. Study Scriptures
Dive into the scriptures and study every instance where the words “anger,” “angry,” “wrath,” etc., occur. The word of God is life and that life can help you manage your emotions.
Be not hasty in thy spirit to be angry: for anger resteth in the bosom of fools.” (Ecclesiastes 7:9 KJV)
5. Walk Away
The next time you get very angry, walk away and check the mirror. If you can see the lumps there, relax first before making a decision.
Ecc 7:9 (MSG) Don’t be quick to fly off the handle. Anger boomerangs. You can spot a fool by the lumps on his head.
6. Soft Answers
When your partner is angry, don’t raise your voice back. Talk in a whisper, and the demon of wrath will fly away.
7. Two Angry People
Consider Simeon and Levi, who had serious anger problems:
“Simeon and Levi are brethren; instruments of cruelty are in their habitations. O my soul, come not thou into their secret; unto their assembly, mine honour, be not thou united: for in their anger they slew a man, and in their self-will they digged down a wall.” (Genesis 49:5-6 KJV)
Their father placed a curse on them for their actions:
“Cursed be their anger, for it was fierce; and their wrath, for it was cruel: I will divide them in Jacob, and scatter them in Israel.” (Genesis 49:7 KJV)
Their problem was that they were both angry at the same time. Never get angry at the same time your partner is angry.
8. Dealing with Anger as a Single
If you recognize that you have anger issues, don’t ignore it and don’t play the denial card. Here are the steps you can take:
Talk to a Pastor or Mentor: Seek guidance from spiritual leaders.
Read Books: Find books on anger management and read them.
Study the Scriptures: Allow your mind to be renewed by God’s word.
Pray for Help: Pray to God for assistance in overcoming your anger.
When you pray to God for help, you might find more situations that provoke you. This can be a way to understand the depth of your need for help and start working on it consciously.
9. Dealing with Anger as Married Couples
Anger in marriage can be particularly dangerous. Here are some guidelines for managing anger in a marital relationship:
a. Avoid Simultaneous Anger.
If one partner is angry, the other should remain calm.
b. Don’t Raise Your Voice.
Talk in a whisper to defuse the situation.
Pro 15:1 (KJV) A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger.
c. Avoid Provocative Language:
Respond with gentle words like, “Dear, it is well.”
10. Prayer and Confession
Confession. I am not a fool, therefore, I don’t get angry easily.
Prayer. I curse every root of anger and wrath in my life in Jesus’ name.
Don’t Let Anger Ruin Your Love Life. Mr. and Mrs. Johnson were the quintessential couple everybody admired. But what people saw was the pulchritude. Within the family, the demon of anger reigned supreme. In no time the seemingly beautiful marriage was ruined, because of uncontrollable anger. That which could have been one of the best became a mess. Their marital life could have been a counsel to others, but they canceled each other out!
There are some things that will work and there are some things that will not work. Now, you don’t need to spend another five years trying to experiment what will work and what will not work. You only need to be willing to learn. Every time you make a mistake, it has the potential of hardening your heart against God. This is a tactic of the devil, so life is not to be permanently lived on Mistake Street by Error Avenue. You can decide to go for wisdom.
Be slow to get angry. Don’t Let Anger Ruin Your Love Life. This is what the scripture expressly advises. Not a few have lost precious relationships because of anger tantrums. Now, it is okay to be angry sometimes as a human, I do get angry myself sometimes. But when your anger becomes compulsive, uncontrollable and bothering on violence, you need to be careful.
When you get angry, you beat people around you, pick up a fight or destroy things, then you need to consciously pray to God for help. Go on the net and Google ‘anger management’ and get some materials that will help you. Go into the scriptures and study every instance where the words, “anger, angry, wrath, etc occurs.
One of such scriptures says Be not hasty in thy spirit to be angry: for anger resteth in the bosom of fools. (Ecclesiastes 7:9 KJV)
In order words, if you get angry too quickly, you are a…. (clearing throat) I didn’t write that, you said it!
The translation I like most is this: Don’t be quick to fly off the handle. Anger boomerangs. You can spot a fool by the lumps on his head. (Ecclesiastes 7:9 Message)
The Message translation isn’t playing at all! The next time, you get so angry, walk away and check the mirror, if you can see the lumps there, relax first before you make a decision! Unnecessary anger will ruin relationships. Anger problems will make you say things you will regret later.
See the example of these guys in the scriptures who had serious anger problems. Simeon and Levi are brethren; instruments of cruelty are in their habitations. O my soul, come not thou into their secret; unto their assembly, mine honour, be not thou united: for in their anger they slew a man, and in their self will they digged down a wall (Genesis 49:5-6 KJV)
Here, their father began to talk about these two brothers who in fits of anger, killed and wiped out a whole community! You see, unnecessary anger will lead to death…death of things, death of relationships, death of opportunities, and even death of marriage!
Do you know how many people have called their lawyers in anger and opted out of marriage, then got married to another person angrily only to discover that the new person is worse? May you not get married to an angry person who has an instrument of cruelty in their habitations. Their father was so furious at their actions and actually placed a curse on them!
Cursed be their anger, for it was fierce; and their wrath, for it was cruel: I will divide them in Jacob, and scatter them in Israel. (Genesis 49:7 KJV)
Look at those words: scatter, divide…that is what fierce anger leads to! Don’t Let Anger Ruin Your Love Life
If as a single you can see that you have anger issues, don’t ignore it and don’t play the denial card. Talk to your pastor or mentor, get books and read, get into the scripture and study so that your mind can be renewed, and pray to God to help you!
Now when you pray to God to help, more people will come your way to get you angry more and provoke you the more, so that each time you lose it, you can really know you need help and then you can consciously begin to work on it.
As married couples, if both of you are angry at the same time, it can be dangerous. There are husbands that will not talk to their wives for days. That is not being a man! There are wives that get hurt at everything and will close up their spirits against their husbands. How will your prayers be answered?! You can’t run your home like that! You are trusting God to conceive, yet you are always fighting, don’t you know that is the devil?
If one is angry, the other should calm down. Here is some advice for you: A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger. (Proverbs 15:1 KJV)
Try and see how it works. When the other is angry, don’t raise your voice too. Talk in a whisper, the demon of wrath will fly away! You see that demon works by working you up and causing you to vibrate like the fan made in Aba!
So, when you refuse to vibrate and say the wrong words, the demon loses its power! If he or she goes like, ‘You are crazy! You are mad!’ (That shouldn’t be the language of God’s children)
And then you respond with, ‘Your father is crazy, you mama don craze!”
What do you think will happen?
What about a soft answer, almost a whisper, that goes like, “dear, it is well.” Don’t Let Anger Ruin Your Love Life
God will help us all in Jesus’ name.
I rebuke the spirit of anger in your relationship and marriage, I ask the Spirit of God to intervene in your satiation and give you the wisdom to handle it in Jesus’ name!
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I am not a fool, therefore, I don’t get angry easily.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY I curse every root of anger and wrath in my life in Jesus’ name
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Make no friendship with an angry man; and with a furious man thou shalt not go: (Proverbs 22:24 KJV)
