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I want to share with you this morning a few things I have learnt over time. I want to identify three out of many practices that you should avoid in your marriage. Avoiding them is tactically avoiding unnecessary headaches. May God continue to give is His wisdom.

1. Avoid reporting your spouse to your in-laws or parents or any other third party aside from your mentors/pastors.
From counseling experiences, it usually backfires and sets the family more into crisis than bring them out of it. Once the husband realizes he is no longer in charge of his family, he is going to get really defensive. Once the wife sees that her husband takes instruction from his parents while leaving her out, she is going to react.

Reporting to parents or in-laws? It will not end well. It will always not work out. It’s natural for parents to be sentimental to their children. There will be bias and emotions will flare.

Most of the time, you report to them when there are issues but forget to call them back when you settle the issues, so they keep making up their mind.

If the parents are the only persons on earth your spouse listens to, that is when you may involve them. If otherwise, do not do it.

2. Do not report your spouse to your colleagues or boss.
The devil is so smart, looking for avenues to deal with you. If you report your spouse to your colleague or boss, the devil can capitalize on it and set you up for an emotional affair.

An emotional affair is just a few strokes away from adultery.  You really do not want to thread that path

 3. Do not manipulate your spouse emotionally
This will affect your prayer life. Once your spouse says or does something that does not resonate with you, you simply withdraw and give an attitude. It’s called silent treatment and it’s not cool in all its shades. That is not the way to grow. Avoid every form of manipulation.

Stay together, pray together.

May God bless your marriage!

I am wise. I deal with my spouse according to knowledge

Lord, give me the needed wisdom to handle my home

1 Pet 3:7 (NLT)In the same way, you husbands must give honor to your wives. Treat your wife with understanding as you live together. She may be weaker than you are, but she is your equal partner in God’s gift of new life. Treat her as you should so your prayers will not be hindered.

Look out for the word ‘honor’ in your relationship

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