Relationship and Marriage Red Flags! Top 10 Signs You Need Help Part 2 

by Rev Dunamis Okunowo | May 23, 2024 | Singles and Married

Relationship and Marriage Red Flags! Top 10 Signs You Need Help Part 2 

We continue from yesterday.

6. You’re leading separate lives

This another one of the Signs You Need Help. Make a conscious effort to prioritize quality time together.
We all need our own space and independence. But when you and your partner start feeling more like roommates than soulmates, that’s a major red flag. It’s like you’re two ships passing in the night, never really connecting or sharing experiences. The Bible hits the nail on the head with Amos 3:3 – “Do two walk together unless they have agreed to do so?”

I’ll never forget this one couple I knew. Let’s call them… Sally and Buddy. These two were so wrapped up in their own worlds that they practically needed a translator to communicate. Sally was always off doing her own thing, while Buddy was glued to his video games. Date nights? Forget about it! They were living that separate lives life to the maximum.

But here’s the thing – a relationship is supposed to be a partnership, a journey you take together. When you stop making that quality time for each other a priority, the connection starts to fray. It’s like a plant that doesn’t get enough water – it’ll eventually wither and die.

So, what’s the solution? Well, it’s all about being intentional. Set aside regular date nights, plan little adventures together, or even just snuggle up and watch your favorite movie.

7. Trust has been broken

This is one of the Signs You Need Help. We’re not just talking little white lies here, but the kind that makes you question everything and feel like you’re walking on eggshells.

I had this one friend, we’ll call her Samantha, who went through the ultimate trust betrayal. Her partner of five years had been having an emotional affair, sharing deep thoughts and feelings with someone else behind her back. When she found out, it was like her entire world shattered into a million pieces.

Samantha was devastated. How could someone she trusted so completely violate that sacred bond? She felt like a fool for believing in their partnership.

But here’s the thing – rebuilding trust is possible, but it takes hard work from both parties. It’s a conscious choice to forgive, to be accountable, and to communicate openly, even when it’s uncomfortable.

Trust is precious, my friends. Once it’s been broken, working to repair it is one of the highest callings. It’s about choosing to see the higher road, even when the pain is fresh. It’s about loving bigger than you ever thought possible.

8. You’re feeling unheard or ignored

This is one of the Signs You Need Help. We’ve all been there, right? You try to share something that’s important to you – a frustration at work or an idea for a vacation. But instead of your partner’s full attention, you get the dreaded glazed-over look or one-word responses. It’s the romantic equivalent of talking to a brick wall.

Listen, communication is the lifeblood of any healthy relationship. Without it, that once-blazing connection starts to feel like a dying campfire. The embers are still there, but they’re getting faint and harder to re-ignite with each passing day.

The Bible says in James 1:19, “Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry.” Being an active listener, fully present and engaged, is one of the greatest gifts you can give your partner. It’s a way of saying “You matter. Your thoughts and feelings are valuable to me.

So make that conscious choice, every single day, to listen with your whole soul. Put down your phone, turn off the TV, and drink in every word your partner has to say, as if it’s the nectar of the gods. Let them feel that soul-quenching feeling of being truly heard.

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9. You’re not supporting each other’s goals and dreams

Here is another one of the Signs You Need HelpYour relationship should be a dream team – a dynamic duo working together to help each other soar to new heights. When one person’s wings start to falter, the other is there to provide an updraft and keep them aloft.

Not supporting one another is like two planets spinning in opposite directions, never quite aligning. And as Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 remind us, “Two are better than one…If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up.”

Supporting each other’s goals and dreams doesn’t have to be complicated. It can be as simple as listening intently when your partner shares a new idea, asking questions to understand their vision more deeply. It’s celebrating each tiny victory and reassuring them through the setbacks.

10. You’re feeling stuck or stagnant

How do you know if your relationship has veered off that path of joyful partnership and stumbled into a growth-stunting rut? Well, there are a few telltale signs to watch out for:

The conversation well has run dry.

Date night is a distant memory. The core values and interests that once bound you together have drifted in separate directions.

If any of those strike you, fear not! This isn’t an inevitable death sentence for your relationship – it’s a wake-up call to get that growth groove back.

Here’s the truth – a relationship is a living, breathing entity. And like anything alive, it requires the oxygen of growth, progress, and exploration to survive. Stagnation is a slow suffocation.

So go ahead, be bold! Shake up those comfortable patterns. Nurture your evolving partnership with the same devotion and joy that first sparked it into existence.

Choose growth – in all its messy, unpredictable, breathtakingly beautiful forms. That’s what true partnership is all about.