How Can I Locate The Right Person?

How Can I Locate The Right Person?

Reading Time: 3 minutes

Betty is so frustrated in the relationships she had been involved with. She seems to have the knack for attracting the wrong people all the time. From deceivers to casanovas and then out-rightly wicked people, she kept having broken relationships. At a time, she began to think that there might be a curse lurking somewhere.

Andy had similar experiences in the hands of what he can only describe as strange women. They kept ripping him off, collecting his money, and eventually eloping just at the times commitments were about to be initiated. He didn’t know what to do again. He seems locked up in the pit of confusion with no flicker of light or hope? 

Is there ever a way to know the right person as a child of God? Is there ever a way to avoid the wrong man or woman? Will God lead? If God leads, how? How can I be kept from ungodly people, deceivers, and liars?

Sometimes, you don’t even know which Pastor to talk to because there are so many charlatans who call themselves Pastors but will readily take advantage of naive ladies and end up abusing the abused! It’s pathetic and heart-rendering!

Let us get into the scripture to see some verses in answers to avoiding wrong people in relationships. The truth is that if you are able to avoid the wrong people, you will not waste time and resources on what will not eventually work. You will not be dissipating your energy on wasteful and useless relationships. 

(10)When wisdom entereth into thine heart, and knowledge is pleasant unto thy soul; (11)Discretion shall preserve thee, understanding shall keep thee: (12)To deliver thee from the way of the evil man, from the man that speaketh froward things; (13) Who leave the paths of uprightness, to walk in the ways of darkness; (14)Who rejoice to do evil, and delight in the frowardness of the wicked; (15)Whose ways are crooked, and they froward in their paths: (16)To deliver thee from the strange woman, even from the stranger which flattereth with her words; (17)Which forsaketh the guide of her youth, and forgetteth the covenant of her God.(18) For her house inclineth unto death, and her paths unto the dead.(19)None that go unto her return again, neither take they hold of the paths of life. (20)That thou mayest walk in the way of good men, and keep the paths of the righteous.Pro 2:10-20 KJV

In verses 10 and 11, the Bible says that you will be protected and preserved from falling into the wrong hands.

Verse 12 says ‘it will deliver you from the evil man.’ This means wisdom and knowledge will help you not to say YES to the wrong man.

Message translation of verse 12 says,

‘They’ll keep you from making wrong turns, or following the bad directions.’

That is very profound. It will keep you from making emotional decisions.

Message translation of verse 14 says it will deliver you from ‘These losers who make a game of evil and throw parties to celebrate perversity’  That is, you will be kept away from men that are out to deceive you.

Message translation of verse 15 says it will deliver you from people that are ‘Traveling paths that go nowhere, wandering in a maze of detours and dead ends.’ That is, you will be kept away from jobless, visionless, directionless men. This is how to avoid wrong men.

Further down in verse 16, the Bible says ‘To deliver thee from the strange woman!’ This is awesome. You don’t want to get involved with a strange woman. Solomon married strange women and they turned his heart away from God.

Whether you are a man or woman, you are protected. But notice it all boils down to the fact that wisdom must enter your heart and knowledge must be pleasant to your soul. Go after wisdom. Stay in church and learn. Buy books and study.

The key to all this seems to be in verse 10, …when wisdom enters your heart. If wisdom can only enter my heart, I can avoid evil men and strange women. I can be kept from time and resources-wasting relationships. 

I will go after wisdom. I will locate the right person

O Lord, help me locate the right person

And here’s why: GOD gives out Wisdom free, is plainspoken in Knowledge and Understanding. (Pro 2:6 MSG)

Start searching for knowledge of God’s word now.

Ezek 20-21

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Eight Kinds of People You Cannot Fall In Love With

Eight Kinds of People You Cannot Fall In Love With

Reading Time: 5 minutes

Who do you fall in love with? I will address that by telling you who not to fall in love with. You see, everybody has a purpose in your life, and when you fail to discern that purpose, it will lead to abuse or you end up being abused.

1. Don’t fall in love with the same sex

Now, forget about all the propaganda and agitation going on around the world, this lifestyle is clearly forbidden in the scripture. It was specifically mentioned in the scriptures as unnatural. How can you fall in love with same-sex and then devise means of sleeping together?

Worse followed. Refusing to know God, they soon didn’t know how to be human either––women didn’t know how to be women, men didn’t know how to be men. Sexually confused, they abused and defiled one another, women with women, men with men––all lust, no love. And then they paid for it, oh, how they paid for it––emptied of God and love, godless and loveless wretches (Romans 1:26-27 Message)

It is a practice you must not dabble into as a child of God and if you are already into it, you must seek help immediately. I minister around in churches and when I make altar calls for people with these issues, I am amazed at how such lies and perversion have crept into churches. I once had to do training for certain denominations on how to handle this kind of scenario when a committed member is suddenly discovered as living the gay lifestyle.

Now listen to me, when you start finding yourself attracted to the same sex and with sexual feelings, don’t ever accept the lie of the devil that you were created that way. God is not an author of confusion. Male and female created he them. There is nothing like Adam and Steve or Eve and Eva!

2. Don’t fall in love with your pastor

A lot of ladies like their pastors. It is understandable because he is anointed and you hear him all the time while he is covered with God’s glory. In fact, the scripture says anointing attracts!

Because of the savour of thy good ointments thy name is as ointment poured forth, therefore do the virgins love thee. (Song of Songs 1:3 KJV)

But you need to understand that your pastor is another woman’s husband! You can like him, but when that likeness is bothering on obsession, and you are falling in love, it is time you caution yourself.

You also need to understand that your pastor is first of all a man before he is a man of God. He has all the strengths and weaknesses as well. He does not live in heaven. When you have been going for counsels every day, and you are falling in love, and your pastor is enjoying your presence daily, it is better to withdraw because there are counsels that can cancel a man’s destiny.

When you know you have developed feelings for your pastor, what are you still doing with him every day in a counseling session that has not finished? You need to help yourself and help your pastor as well. In fellowships on campuses, care must be taken particularly not to use your position to defile people you are meant to lead.

3. Don’t fall in love with your lecturer

In your bid to pass an examination, don’t end up in the bed of your lecturer. There are no ways you want to explain it, it is a dangerous trend to take.

4. Don’t fall in love with your sibling

You won’t be able to get married to your sibling, so why indulge in unnecessary games and tell yourselves you are in love? If you have been sexually involved with a sibling or you still involved, that is what the Bible describes as incest. Even society frowns at it. You can go to God and ask Him to forgive you and He will forgive once you are genuinely repentant.

5. Don’t fall in love with a minor.

Those feelings you have for a three-year-old or a five-year-old child are demonic and you need to seek help so that you don’t end up becoming an abuser and end up messing up that child’s life. Leave that little cousin alone! Leave that innocent niece alone and stop kissing her all the time! Stop putting her on your laps! You need to confront yourself.

Be real with your feelings because it doesn’t happen in one day, it is progressive. That is why the Bible says judge yourself that you not be judged.

6. Don’t fall in love with your parents’ age mate

Don’t fall in love with a married man who is as old as your father or a woman who is as old as your mum because of the mammon spirit. Promises of going to Dubai, shopping in London, allowance of hundreds of thousands every month are not worth the agony and regrets that will later follow a person that gives his or her body out as a commodity! Your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost; it is not something to trade for money. How would you be another woman’s headache, sleeping with her husband, and then think you will have God’s support?

If everything is about seed and harvest, what then will happen to your own home? The next time he comes telling you that you are the one he loves, tell him he is not only lying, but he is lying in state. Tell him to go keep his money and go back to his wife. That is how to live right and trust God as your provider and stop looking at a mere man as your Jehovah Jireh!

7. Don’t fall in love with an unbeliever

Don’t fall in love with a man or a lady that does not know God. Don’t even pray about it, because it won’t work out and God will not answer that prayer. Don’t bother to say you will convert him or her because you are not the Holy Spirit that converts. You have not even converted yourself!

Don’t become partners with those who reject God. How can you make a partnership out of right and wrong? That’s not partnership; that’s war. Is light best friends with dark? Does Christ go strolling with the Devil? Do trust and mistrust hold hands (2 Corinthians 6:14-15 Message)

8. Don’t fall in love with an abuser

Finally, but not exhaustively, don’t fall in love with an abuser! Why would you stick with the one that is constantly abusing you physically, sexually, verbally, or emotionally? Why stick with the one that you know is in it for the money? Why stick with a person that slaps you today and begs you after only to come the next day to donate more slaps? Why degrade yourself to be trampled upon and slept with at will? Why fall in love with a person who is not in love with you but using you? Why cope with the one that tells you you are ugly and stupid?

Why are you so generous with your body that you sleep with the one that hates your guts? Who called you into such philanthropy? Child of God, you are more than that! You need to raise your shoulder and walk out of that relationship. If you cannot walk out, then run or even fly away but by all means, free yourself like a bird out of the snare of the fowler, and go into the newness that God has for you!

Our soul is escaped as a bird out of the snare of the fowlers: the snare is broken, and we are escaped. (Psalms 124:7 KJV)

I fall in love with the right person.

Lord, help me to fall in love with the right person.

Get wisdom, get understanding: forget it not; neither decline from the words of my mouth. Forsake her not, and she shall preserve thee: love her, and she shall keep thee (Proverbs 4:5-6 KJV)

Pray in the spirit

Psalms 102

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