Sow kindness, sincerity, faithfulness, practical love, service, patience, understanding, tenderness, and all the good virtues you can think of. By the time all these come together, you will have a great marriage.
Put all your wonderful ingredients together. If you do not have much of those good ingredients (qualities), go buy more (learn good character). Until your ingredients are complete, you cannot have a wonderful meal.
The quality and quantity of your ingredients determine the quality of your meal.
This is the simple recipe for a great marriage. When you study the Bible, read good Christian books, and listen to great quality messages, you are actually assembling your ingredients. By the time you get married, it will be time to ‘cook’ and to prepare for a great time. It is the ingredients that you have amassed that you will put to use. It is what you cook that you will eat. And of course, it is what you eat that gives you strength or weakens you!
You can deliberately look for the right ingredients now. It is not too late. If what you have cooked is a bad taste or inedible and you are considering a divorce, a walkout, and so on, you still have the chance to look for the right ingredients and cook again.
As long as your pot is intact (your mind) and you can still make some fire (in the place of prayer), you can still give it another shot. I can assure you, if your ingredients are right, you will cook a great meal (marriage) and you will eat great!
May God give you wisdom today that you need to turn things around in Jesus name!
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I receive the grace to sow good and right seeds in my marriage. My home is blessed. My marriage is blessed.
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Heavenly Father, I ask you to forgive all wrong actions and wrong seeds sown into my marriage.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Now the works of the flesh are manifest, which are these; Adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lasciviousness, (Gal 5:19 KJV)
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Write out all the good qualities you admire and desire in your marriage. Begin to sow them into your marriage.
Some years back, my wife and I addressed hundreds of teenagers in a particular meeting. It was amazing at the kind of questions those little ones asked. Some of them were as young as eleven years old. They asked about gay marriage, sex, masturbation, and so on.
Some of those questions you wouldn’t think a thirteen-year-old would ask. But you see, it is obvious that a ten-year-old child today is no longer as innocent or as unexposed as a ten-year-old some twenty years ago. Things have changed, and that rapidly too.
One of the conclusions drawn for those young ones is that there is no point in experimenting with what would fail. Life is about what you sow!
You cannot fool God, so don’t make a fool of yourself! You will harvest what you plant. (Gal 6:7 CEV)
This is so simple yet so profound. You will definitely reap whatever you sow; someday, somehow. You cannot reap what you did not sow. It is like putting potatoes on fire and expecting to eat a dinner of fried rice and chicken. It does not happen that way!
Some people are busy sowing wild seeds into their marriage and they expect to have a happy married life. People sow into the flesh; they follow the dictates of their fleshly appetite. They get involved with all manner of sexual activities and impurities, yet they expect all to be well in their marriage. If you are thinking of cheating God in this way, you are very much deceived. God CAN NOT be mocked!
Each time you sow bad seeds into your marriage, something dies in the marriage. When you sow to the wind, you usually reap the whirlwind. Some others do not necessarily sow sexual sins in their marriage, but they sow anger, bitterness, strife, oppression, pain, and unforgiving spirit.
Some commit adultery and expect their homes to be peaceful. It is impossible! You cannot be messing around with teenage girls and expect your children to be blessed. Someone somewhere will defile your daughters too…
To be continued…
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I receive the grace to sow good and right seeds in my marriage. My home is blessed. My marriage is blessed.
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Heavenly Father, I ask you to forgive all wrong actions and wrong seeds sown into my marriage.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Now the works of the flesh are manifest, which are these; Adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lasciviousness, (Gal 5:19 KJV)
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Write out all the good qualities you admire and desire in your marriage. Begin to sow them into your marriage.
It is important you look for a lady who is your friend. Friends don’t want to hurt one another. Friends love each other truly. Friends forgive each other easily. Friends want to be with one another. Friends don’t have problems with communication. They talk all the time.
It is important that your love grows from friendship. That is why it is not good to rush into a relationship with a person you barely know. There is a huge difference between marrying an acquaintance and marrying a friend.
It is even worse when you decide to marry a stranger that you met on social media. You will not live on Facebook. You will not give birth on Google Plus. You will not cook on LinkedIn.
So, why establish and maintain a relationship over social media?
Why fall in love with a profile? Why become emotionally attached with a voice over the phone? You have to go for a friend and friendship involves constant communication and a committed relationship.
Before you fall in love, before you are caught in a rapturous ecstasy, try and see her one on one! It is impossible to fall in love with a person you don’t know, so become friends first and don’t be caught up in infatuation.
2. Look for a homely woman
The next thing to look for in a woman is homeliness. Look for a lady that can cook! Yes, she is not a house-help, but she has to know how to cook! Good food is very important to men.
As a single lady, train yourself to know how to cook well. If she cannot cook, there will be issues.
If as a lady, you had grown up among several house-helps and you barely go to the kitchen, you have to deliberately teach yourself how to prepare good food in preparation for marriage.
If you visit your fiancée and all you are served are always noodles, flakes, beverages, and refreshments, you should start suspecting! That’s a joke!
Be creative with cooking. Get on the Internet and download recipe ideas.
To be continued…
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I am deliberate in my approach to find love
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY O Lord, turn things around in my favour
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY And that is how husbands ought to love their wives. They’re really doing themselves a favor––since they’re already “one” in marriage Eph 5:28 MSG
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Start preparing for your marriage now.
As we conclude on this topic, below are practical steps to take so as not to awaken love before time.
Our scripture remains
I charge you, O ye daughters of Jerusalem, by the roes, and by the hinds of the field, that ye stir not up, nor awake my love, till he please.
Son 3:5 (KJV)
1. Don’t visit at ungodly hours. He’s alone, living alone, and then you decide to visit by 9.00 pm. Are you going for a night vigil? Never visit a guy at a guest house, hotel etc.
2. Don’t go and cook dinner for a single guy. After dinner, certain things usually happen. Don’t try finding out.
3. When you are together, don’t rest your head on his laps. He’s going to get a hard-on, and things can get messy from there.
4. Don’t rub at his chest, beards, neck, and so on. Don’t lean over on his chest. The hands would want to get busy. Those could be erogenous areas that will weaken your resolve. It doesn’t mean if you just finished speaking in tongues.
5. Don’t talk dirty with each other. Don’t start asking for his view about sex. Things can get really crooked fast and you might be discussing pornography soon.
6. Don’t press your breasts on him, while deceiving yourself that you are praying together. You are not only stirring up love, you are setting him on fire. You, him, heaven, and hell know that you are not praying. You will trap yourself that way.
7. Don’t tease him Don’t ask questions like “Are you really a man?” Stop asking him if he can really perform on bed. At that point, it is not the devil tempting you, you are the one tempting the devil.
8. Avoid prolonged hugs, kissing, smooching, All in the name of greeting each other.
9. Stop discussing past sexual escapades. Stop telling him how many guys you have slept with. Stop describing graphically your past sexual escapades. If he is not a mature Christian, he will feel cheated and will want to have his way with you as well.
10. Stop watching romantic movies together. Your bodies will long for each other. If you continue, one day, you will find yourself in the land of perpetual compromise.
I can go on and on, but I’m sure you already have an idea of what I mean by saying you should not excite love. May God grant you more understanding.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I will not stir up love before time
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Pray that God will keep your feet strong
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Eph 6:13 (KJV) Wherefore take unto you the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand.
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Do not awaken love before time
Today, we continue on our topic which we started few days back.
We have talked about
1. Be ready to massage his ego 2. Be ready to respect him 3. Be ready to satisfy him sexually
Here we go;
4. Be ready to cook for him Now, this is very important. Food is very important and it is something constant in a family system.
‘Whatever happened to house-helps?’ Yes, they can help, but don’t let them take over the kitchen completely except in situations where you are your husband agree to employ trusted family cooks. But this is not usually the scenario in young families. Not a few ladies have their families disrupted by house-helps who were lured by the man in the house.
Even if the house-help will help in certain times, which is inevitable, try as much as possible to serve your husband yourself. This is very important. By the time you are not always there for days, while a young girl serves your husband, anything can happen if the man lacks self-control or has no fear for God.
While you are still single, don’t leave your mum to do everything, get in there and learn all you can.
Don’t be like the lady who got married and for days they were just eating out. After a while the husband got tired and requested for Amala. (A Nigerian local delicacy) Then trouble began. So the pot of water is on the fire, and she calls her mum to ask, ‘Mum the pot is on the fire now, at what minute do I add the yam powder?
5. Be ready to dress for him This is important as well. You should learn to dress for your husband at home. Why is this important? Men are moved by sight. They are moved by what they see, including anointed men and apostles and popes!
Don’t be like a lady who is so busy tied up in a wrapper and that was the last picture her husband saw before leaving for work. By the time he comes back, she is back in the wrapper trying to get food ready! Meanwhile, at work, he is accosted by this delectable, adorable and impeccably dressed secretary every morning who is saying ‘I am available’ with her body language! If the guy doesn’t’ know what he is doing or is brainless like Message translation says concerning adultery, he will simply mess up.
I don’t like wrappers and my wife doesn’t like it as well. So unromantic! It is not a sin to wear a lingerie at home! Dress cute for your husband at home and learn to set him in the mood. He likes that, he may not verbalize that, but I am helping him to do that now.
Singles, watch what you wear to your fiancée’s house. Don’t kill the guy; let him fulfill destiny! You are going to see him so that you can pray together by 9.00pm in a mini skirt that has a slit! How will the guy pray? The eyes will be turning red, the tongues will change and you will think it is the anointing? Nay, he is suffering and his tongues is probably, ‘O Lord deliver me from what I see with my eyes!’
When they David saw Bathsheba taking her bath, a seed for adultery and murder was sown. When Samson saw a harlot, he went in unto her. He saw another lady, and he could not speak correctly again, he told his father,
‘Get her for me to wife!’ Check it out in your Bible!
Men can lose their temper, temperature and temperament altogether when they see a beautiful lady!!! Men, can you bear me witness?
What other things do you need to know before saying I do?
To be continued…
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I know the things to do to advance my life
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Ask for wisdom to know the things to do.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Proverbs 4:7(KJV) Wisdom is the principal thing; therefore get wisdom: and with all thy getting get understanding.
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Write down the things you are learning.
