Yesterday, we looked at how to handle an affair from the erring spouse part. This is so important because the bulk of the work lies on the spouse that had an affair.
The responsibility is on him/her. The spouse is just to be support and to forgive.
The erring spouse has the responsibility of being brutally truthful, sincere and repentant.
There are some scenarios that the spouse is under demonic influence and finds it difficult to be sincere or truthful. Prayers of God healing by giving him/her a new and clean heart will be necessary. This is because to successfully handle an affair squarely requires sincerity and truthfulness.
Let’s continue today with the other steps. You can read yesterday’s devotionals HERE
4. Attach pain to the experience of having an affair.
Until an affair is associated with pain in the mind and the brain, thorough work is not done. The erring couple must have several quiet moments of self-talk and deep ruminating of the issue. That’s why depending on the situation, the erring spouse must be left alone to have some sober reflections.
This sober reflection is necessary for a certain positive conclusion to be made. Although a lot of prayers are needed in this period. The support of the other spouse is also needed by not criticizing, nagging, and not showing rage or irritability.
A lot of love, emotional support, care, and reassuring words should be given to the erring spouse at such times as this. A spouse should come out of this ordeal stronger, better, and bigger ready to help those in the same predicament.
That’s the way God organized things in the kingdom. What you have overcome, you have the Grace to help set others free.
6. Change the environment.
It might be necessary to that environment where the affair happened. However, this may not always be possible. If you can’t change your environment, you can at least change what YOU do within that compromising environment.
Whether you have lunch breaks together alone with a particular lady, you have to change this. It is to be noted that the affair could be an emotional affair. Don’t be deceived, an emotional affair is as serious as a sexual affair. In God, they are the same.
But I say, anyone who even looks at a woman with lust has already committed adultery with her in his heart. Matthew 5:28 NLT
7. Make sure you don’t play the blame game.
What has happened has happened. Don’t cry over split milk. Don’t wallow in self-pity. That is the devil domain. You don’t want to cooperate with the devil to make your freedom difficult.
You must embrace Gods free gift of forgiveness and obey all His principles.
Don’t go to the extreme concerning yourself. David committed adultery and murder yet God called him a man after my heart. God restored him and he was one of the most famous kings on earth.
Don’t doubt God’s love. When He says He has forgiven you He means exactly that. Embrace His love and His forgiveness.
I believe you have found these steps helpful. May God enlighten our darkness in Jesus name.
God bless your marriage.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY
I am committed to my marriage vows.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY
Lord, help me to love my spouse appropriately.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
Ephesians 5:22 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY
If you are having an affair, make amends today
BIBLE READING FOR THE DAY
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Affair proof your life and your marriage today. Be sensible and responsible.
God bless us.
God will help me to set healthy boundary to every relationships in order to avoid affairs. I choose to tell my husband everything needed to know without hiding things
Affairs are forbidden for us. The covenant of Marriage is stronger than compromise. Don’t leave God!
Affairs have no place in my marriage. Amen
Great words of wisdom. Right or wrong I will always let go not playing the blame game. Thanks Sir and ma
Never you hide anything away from your spouse because, that’s where the devil hide.
God will help us to be faithful to our marriage and avoid anything that will lead to compromise.
‘Attaching pain to affairs’
My marriage is affair-proof
I am committed to my marriage and I will always love and respect my spouse
“Don’t go to the extreme concerning yourself. David committed adultery and murder yet God called him a man after my heart. God restored him and he was one of the most famous kings on earth.”
“You must embrace Gods free gift of forgiveness and obey all His principles.”
“Don’t doubt God’s love. When He says He has forgiven you He means exactly that. Embrace His love and His forgiveness.”
I am committed to my marriage.
May God enlighten our darkness
I am committed to my marriage vows
God’s grace for me against any affair. Amen
I’m committed to my marriage vows. So help me God.