Every wife desires certain core elements in her marriage that foster love, respect, and emotional security. While individual preferences may vary, universal longings are rooted in God’s design for relationships. Understanding these desires can help husbands create a nurturing environment where their wives feel cherished, valued, and supported. Here’s what every wife truly wants in her marriage.
1. To Be Loved Deeply
At the heart of every woman’s longing is the desire to be loved deeply and unconditionally. Ephesians 5:25 instructs husbands to love their wives as Christ loved the church—sacrificially and wholeheartedly. A wife yearns for love that goes beyond words; she wants to feel seen, known, and treasured for who she is.
This kind of love involves expressing affection through both actions and words. Small gestures like holding her hand, leaving encouraging notes, or simply saying “I love you” regularly remind her of your devotion. Love isn’t just about grand romantic gestures—it’s about consistent care and attention.
2. To Feel Respected and Valued
Respect is foundational to a thriving marriage. Peter 3:7 urges husbands to treat their wives with honor as co-heirs of the grace of life. Wives want to know that their opinions matter, that their contributions are appreciated, and that they are equal partners in the journey of life.
Respect means listening without interrupting, valuing her input, and supporting her dreams and goals. It also means avoiding criticism or dismissive behavior. When a wife feels respected, she feels safe to express herself fully and contribute meaningfully to the relationship.
3. Emotional Connection and Communication
Wives crave deep emotional intimacy—the kind that comes from open, honest communication. They want to share their thoughts, fears, joys, and struggles with their husbands and feel understood and supported. James 1:19 reminds us to be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry.
Active listening is key. Put away distractions, make eye contact, and engage genuinely when she speaks. Ask thoughtful questions and validate her feelings, even if you don’t fully understand them. An emotional connection builds trust and strengthens the bond between husband and wife.
4. Leadership Rooted in Love
A wife looks to her husband for spiritual and relational leadership—but not domination. She desires a leader who leads with humility, gentleness, and wisdom, following Christ’s example (Colossians 3:19). This kind of leadership creates a sense of stability and protection within the marriage.
Spiritual leadership includes praying together, studying Scripture, and making decisions that align with God’s will. Leading with love means prioritizing her well-being, seeking unity, and modeling Christlike character. A loving leader inspires confidence and admiration in his wife.
5. Quality Time Together
Time is one of the most precious gifts a husband can give his wife. In our busy world, it’s easy to let responsibilities overshadow relational priorities, but Proverbs 18:22 says, “He who finds a wife finds what is good.” Investing time in the relationship demonstrates that she is a priority.
Quality time doesn’t have to be elaborate—it could be a quiet evening at home, a walk together, or a shared hobby. What matters most is being present and intentional. Regular date nights or moments of undivided attention reassure her that she holds a special place in your heart.
While every wife is unique, these core desires—to be loved deeply, respected, emotionally connected, led with love, and given quality time—are universal. Meeting these needs requires effort, patience, and a willingness to prioritize your wife above other distractions.
Husbands, remember that loving your wife well reflects not only your commitment to her but also your reverence for God. As you seek to fulfill these desires, pray for wisdom and guidance, trusting that God will bless your efforts to honor Him in your marriage.
Ultimately, a happy wife contributes to a happy home. By nurturing these aspects of your relationship, you’ll build a strong, joyful, and God-honoring partnership that stands the test of time. After all, “He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the Lord” (Proverbs 18:22).
Life is unpredictable, and there may be moments when it feels like everyone has turned their back on you—friends, family, or even people you trusted deeply. But here’s the unshakable truth: God will never abandon you. His presence is constant, His love unconditional, and His promises eternal. Let’s explore why you can trust that God will always be by your side, no matter what you face.
1. God’s Covenant Promises Are Unbreakable
Throughout Scripture, God establishes covenants with His people—promises that reflect His unwavering faithfulness. In Deuteronomy 31:6, Moses reassures Israel: “Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; He will never leave you nor forsake you.”
This promise isn’t limited to ancient Israel—it applies to you today. God’s covenant with us through Jesus Christ ensures that His presence remains steadfast. No matter how dark the night or overwhelming the storm, He keeps His word. His commitment to you is unbreakable.
2. Jesus Paid the Price to Be With You Forever
The ultimate proof of God’s refusal to abandon you is found at the cross. Romans 5:8 declares, “But God demonstrates His own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” Jesus willingly gave His life so that you could have an eternal relationship with Him. Through His sacrifice, He bridged the gap between humanity and God, making it possible for His Spirit to dwell within you (John 14:16-17).
Because of Jesus, you are never alone. The Holy Spirit lives inside every believer, guiding, comforting, and empowering you daily. Even in your weakest moments, God’s Spirit is there, reminding you of His love and presence.
3. God’s Nature Is Faithful and Steadfast
Malachi 3:6 reminds us, “I the Lord do not change.” Unlike human relationships, which can falter due to circumstances or emotions, God’s character is immutable. He is faithful, compassionate, and merciful—always ready to embrace you with open arms. Lamentations 3:22-23 echoes this truth: “Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for His compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is Your faithfulness.”
No matter how far you feel from Him, God’s heart toward you remains unchanged. His love doesn’t waver based on your performance or mistakes. It’s rooted in who He is—a loving Father who delights in being near to you.
4. God Sees You in Your Struggles
Psalm 139:7-10 beautifully illustrates God’s omnipresence: “Where can I go from Your Spirit? Where can I flee from Your presence? If I go up to the heavens, You are there; if I make my bed in the depths, You are there.” There is nowhere you can hide from God’s watchful care. Whether you’re soaring in success or sinking in despair, He sees you and knows your pain.
Even when you feel invisible or forgotten, God notices every tear, hears every prayer, and counts every sigh. Isaiah 41:10 assures us, “So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.” You are never out of His sight or beyond His reach.
5. God Works All Things Together for Your Good
When life feels chaotic or unfair, it’s easy to wonder if God has abandoned you. But Romans 8:28 offers profound comfort: “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose.” Though you may not understand His plan in the moment, God uses every trial and triumph to shape you into the person He created you to be.
God’s absence is never the reason for your struggles—instead, He walks beside you through them, using each experience to refine your faith and draw you closer to Him. Trust that He hasn’t left you; He’s working behind the scenes for your ultimate good.
God’s promise to never abandon you is woven throughout Scripture and sealed by His very nature. From His unchanging faithfulness to the indwelling presence of the Holy Spirit, He proves time and again that He is always with you. When loneliness creeps in or doubts arise, anchor yourself in His promises. Speak them aloud, meditate on them, and let them renew your hope.
Deuteronomy 31:8 concludes with these powerful words: “The Lord Himself goes before you and will be with you; He will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.” Whatever season you find yourself in today, rest assured that God is holding you close. He won’t let go—not now, not ever.
Forgiveness and Forbearance in Relationships and Marriage
In any relationship—whether romantic, familial, or platonic—conflicts and offenses are inevitable. Human beings are imperfect, and even the closest bonds can be tested by misunderstandings, hurtful words, or unmet expectations. However, forgiveness and forbearance are two powerful tools that God provides to restore unity, deepen love, and sustain lasting relationships. Let’s explore how these principles play a vital role in nurturing healthy connections.
1. Forgiveness: Releasing the Debt of Offense
Forgiveness is the act of letting go of resentment or vengeance when someone wrongs you. It doesn’t mean excusing their behavior or pretending the offense didn’t happen; rather, it’s choosing to release them from the “debt” they owe you. Ephesians 4:32 instructs us, “Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.”
In marriage and relationships, forgiveness is essential because no one is immune to mistakes. Holding onto grudges creates bitterness and erodes trust over time. When we forgive, we model Christ’s grace toward us (Colossians 3:13) and open the door for healing and reconciliation. Forgiveness isn’t always easy—it requires humility and strength—but it’s necessary for true intimacy.
2. Forbearance: Bearing with One Another’s Imperfections
While forgiveness addresses specific wrongs, forbearance involves enduring ongoing challenges or irritations without becoming resentful. Colossians 3:13 says, “Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone.” Forbearance means having patience and tolerance for your partner’s quirks, weaknesses, or differences—even when they frustrate you.
Marriage especially requires forbearance because living closely with another person inevitably highlights areas where you clash. Perhaps your spouse leaves things messy, forgets important dates, or struggles with emotional expression. Instead of reacting harshly, choose to extend grace, remembering that you, too, have flaws that require patience from others.
3. The Role of Communication in Forgiveness and Forbearance
Effective communication is key to practicing both forgiveness and forbearance. Misunderstandings often escalate conflicts, so addressing issues calmly and honestly is crucial. James 1:19 advises, “Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry.”
When an offense occurs, take time to process your emotions before responding. Approach the conversation with a desire to understand rather than accuse. Use phrases like “I felt hurt when…” instead of “You always…” This helps foster constructive dialogue and prevents defensiveness.
Likewise, when practicing forbearance, communicate your needs kindly. If something bothers you consistently, share it gently rather than bottling it up until resentment builds. Healthy communication strengthens both forgiveness and long-suffering in relationships.
4. Modeling Christlike Love
Forgiveness and forbearance reflect Christ’s unconditional love for us. He bore our sins on the cross, offering full forgiveness despite our unworthiness (Romans 5:8). As believers, we’re called to imitate His example in our marriages and relationships.
In moments of conflict, ask yourself: How would Jesus respond? Would He withhold grace or offer mercy? By keeping Christ at the center of your interactions, you’ll find it easier to forgive quickly and bear burdens patiently. Love covers a multitude of sins (1 Peter 4:8), and when love leads, forgiveness and forbearance naturally follow.
5. Building a Culture of Grace
Forgiveness and forbearance shouldn’t be rare occurrences—they should become part of the fabric of your relationship. Create a culture of grace where apologies are freely given and received, and imperfections are met with understanding. Proverbs 17:9 says, “Whoever would foster love covers over an offense.”
Celebrate small victories, like apologizing promptly or choosing not to react angrily during a disagreement. Over time, these habits build resilience and deepen your bond. A marriage rooted in grace becomes a safe haven where both partners feel valued and accepted.
Forgiveness and forbearance aren’t optional in relationships—they’re foundational. Without them, wounds fester, walls go up, and hearts grow distant. But when practiced faithfully, they create space for restoration, growth, and deeper connection.
Remember, none of us deserves God’s forgiveness, yet He lavishes it upon us freely. In the same way, extend that same measure of grace to those you love. As you commit to forgiving fully and bearing patiently, you’ll experience the beauty of a relationship anchored in God’s love. After all, “Love keeps no record of wrongs” (1 Corinthians 13:5)—and neither should we.
Are you a minister, pastor, church worker, or leader who lives in Ibadan? You are cordially invited to “Equip” a Minister’s Conference with Rev Femi Oduwole and Rev Gbeminiyi Eboda as part of our 9th anniversary convention.
Rev Dunamis and Sophia Okunowo will also be hosting us. Attendance is free, but registration is required. Kindly register HERE
Don’t miss it. Spread the word!
Love is more than just words—it’s expressed through consistent actions, attitudes, and sacrifices. While every individual expresses love differently, certain signs reveal genuine affection that aligns with God’s design for relationships. Whether you’re navigating friendship, dating, or marriage, here are key indicators that someone truly loves you.
1. They Prioritize Spending Time with You
Time is one of the most valuable gifts we can give someone. A person who loves you will make intentional efforts to spend quality time with you, even amidst their busy schedule.
Ecclesiastes 3:1 says, “There is a time for everything.”
When they prioritize you, it shows they value your presence and cherish the moments you share.
This doesn’t mean they’ll always be available, but when they do spend time with you, they’re fully present—listening, engaging, and investing in your connection. Their actions demonstrate that you matter deeply to them.
2. They Speak Words of Encouragement and Affirmation
Proverbs 18:21 reminds us, “The tongue has the power of life and death.” Someone who genuinely loves you uses their words to uplift and affirm you. They notice your strengths, celebrate your successes, and offer encouragement during tough times. Instead of criticizing or tearing you down, they speak life into your heart.
Whether it’s a simple compliment, heartfelt praise, or reassurance of your worth, their words reflect kindness and respect. These verbal expressions build trust and remind you of how much you mean to them.
3. They Sacrifice for Your Well-Being
True love involves sacrifice—a willingness to put your needs above their own desires. Ephesians 5:25 calls husbands to love their wives as Christ loved the church—by giving Himself up for her. While this principle applies to marriage, sacrificial love is also evident in other relationships.
A person who loves you will go out of their way to support you, whether it’s helping with practical tasks, offering emotional comfort, or making personal adjustments to accommodate your needs. Their sacrifices aren’t motivated by obligation but by a sincere desire to see you thrive.
4. They Respect Your Boundaries
Respect is a cornerstone of healthy love. A person who truly cares about you honors your boundaries—whether physical, emotional, or relational. They don’t pressure you to compromise your values or disregard your limits. Instead, they seek to understand what makes you feel safe and valued.
1 Peter 3:7 instructs husbands to treat their wives with respect, emphasizing that honor is an essential part of love. Similarly, anyone who loves you will treat you with dignity and consideration, ensuring that you feel respected and cherished.
5. They Support Your Spiritual Growth
A godly person who loves you will encourage your relationship with God rather than hinder it. They understand that your spiritual well-being is foundational to your identity and purpose. Together, you’ll pray, study Scripture, and pursue holiness—not out of obligation, but because they want to grow closer to God alongside you.
Hebrews 10:24-25 highlights this principle: “Let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds.” A loving partner will challenge you to live faithfully, cheer you on in your walk with Christ, and create space for God to work in both of your lives.
Love isn’t defined by grand gestures or fleeting emotions—it’s revealed through steadfast commitment, thoughtful actions, and selfless care. If someone consistently demonstrates these signs, chances are they genuinely love you. However, it’s important to ensure that their behavior aligns with biblical principles and reflects God’s unconditional love.
As you evaluate relationships, remember 1 Corinthians 13:4-7, which describes love as patient, kind, humble, forgiving, and enduring. True love seeks the best for others and points them toward Christ. May you recognize and appreciate those who love you deeply—and strive to love others in the same way. After all, love is not just something we receive; it’s something we give, reflecting the heart of our Creator.
5 Things to Do When You Know Your Future Spouse (Who Is Oblivious)
Are you a minister, pastor, church worker, or leader who lives in Ibadan? You are cordially invited to “Equip” a Minister’s Conference with Rev Femi Oduwole and Rev Gbeminiyi Eboda as part of our 9th anniversary convention.
Rev Dunamis and Sophia Okunowo will also be hosting us. Attendance is free, but registration is required. Kindly register HERE
Don’t miss it. Spread the word!
It’s an exciting, yet challenging situation: you believe you’ve met the person God has for you, but they seem completely unaware of your feelings or intentions. While it’s natural to feel eager or even anxious, remember that relationships built on mutual understanding and shared faith are worth waiting for. Here are five godly steps to take when you know your future spouse is oblivious to your perspective.
1. Pray for Clarity and Wisdom
Before taking any action, bring the situation before God in prayer. Ask Him to confirm whether this person truly is your future spouse and to grant both of you clarity about His will. Pray also for wisdom on how to approach the relationship without pressuring or overwhelming them.
James 1:5 reminds us, “If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault.”
Your prayers can cover areas such as their spiritual growth, openness to a potential relationship, and protection from misunderstandings. Trust that God is at work, even if the other person isn’t yet aware of His plans.
2. Focus on Building Genuine Friendship
Instead of rushing into romance, focus on cultivating a strong, authentic friendship. Friendships provide a foundation for deeper connection and allow you to demonstrate Christlike character over time.
Proverbs 18:24 says, “One who has unreliable friends soon comes to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.” Show them loyalty, kindness, and support without ulterior motives.
As you spend time together, let your actions speak louder than words. Be intentional about learning their interests, values, and dreams. This builds trust and creates space for them to see you as someone they admire and respect—not just someone pursuing them romantically.
3. Discern Their Readiness for Commitment
Sometimes, the reason someone seems oblivious is that they’re not ready for a serious relationship. Take time to observe where they are in life spiritually, emotionally, and mentally. Are they actively seeking God? Do they prioritize personal growth and maturity? If they aren’t in a place to commit, forcing the issue could lead to frustration or harm.
Ecclesiastes 3:1 teaches, “There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens.”
Respect their journey and timing while continuing to grow yourself. A healthy relationship requires two people who are equally prepared to move forward.
4. Communicate with Grace and Humility
When the moment feels right—and after much prayer—consider sharing your heart with them. Approach the conversation humbly, focusing on your feelings rather than pressuring them to respond immediately. For example, you might say, “I value our friendship deeply, and I feel led to share that I see potential for something more between us. I understand if this is unexpected, and I want to honor whatever your thoughts are.”
Communicating openly doesn’t mean demanding an answer; it means giving them space to process and respond in their own time.
Ephesians 4:29 encourages us to use words that build up and give grace to those who hear.
5. Trust God to Work in Their Heart
Ultimately, only God can change hearts and reveal His plan to others. If the person remains oblivious or uncertain, trust that He is working behind the scenes.
Psalm 37:5 assures us, “Commit your way to the Lord; trust in Him, and He will do this.”
Avoid manipulating situations or trying to force intimacy. Instead, surrender the outcome to God and continue living faithfully in the meantime.
Use this season to deepen your walk with Christ, serve others, and prepare yourself for marriage. Whether this person becomes your spouse or not, staying obedient to God ensures that you’ll be ready for whatever He has planned.
Knowing your future spouse who is oblivious to your feelings can test your patience and faith, but it’s also an opportunity to trust God’s timing and provision. By praying, building friendship, discerning readiness, communicating gracefully, and trusting His sovereignty, you position yourself to honor both the other person and the Lord.
Remember, marriage is a covenant designed by God, and both parties must be willing participants in His plan. Keep your focus on being the best version of yourself and walking in alignment with His purposes. Even if the path seems unclear now, be assured that God is faithful to guide you step by step toward the future He has prepared for you.
